Dear Wiseguys. I can't believe how fast things move on the outside. I saw a woman with a landing strip once when I was a kid, but now they're everywhere. The world went and got itself in a big damn hurry. The parole board got me into this halfway house called the Brewer, and a job bagging groceries at Duane Reade. It's hard work. I try to keep up, but my hands hurt most of the time since I have never worked a day in my life. I don't think the store manager likes me very much. Sometimes after work I go to Neil Migliore's and feed the pigeons. I keep thinking John might just show up and say hello. But he never does. I hope wherever he is, he's doing okay and making new friends.

I have trouble sleeping at night. I have bad dreams, like I'm getting indicted. I wake up scared. Sometimes it takes me a while to remember where I am. Maybe I should get me a gun and rob a card game, so they'd send me home. I could shoot the manager at Duane Reade while I was at it, sort of like a bonus. I guess I'm too old for that sort of nonsense anymore. I don't like it here. I'm tired of being afraid all the time. I've decided not to stay. I doubt they'll kick up any fuss. Not for an old mobster like me.