Good points about controlling heavy hitters. I think that's mostly right. But what you described is how a boss relates to the heavy hitter, not entirely why they retain superiority over said hitter.

For Luciano to keep someone like Albert in check and in line with his agenda, he not only needed to reciprocate respect with Albert. Albert also needed to understand that Luciano could inflict much worse punishment on Albert than just killing him. On Luciano's level and Lansky's level, reigning over maniacs meant you had to represent the unthinkable.