PB, did you actually study religion/theology at Fordham or am I misinterpreting your post?

Dwalin, I pretty much agree with your post. Most people I know are non-practicing Muslims while I'm Orthodox Christian from my family, however deep down I doubt I will never be a believer no matter how much I'd like. I'm an atheist though and through, maybe even a nihilist and I'm okay with it.
I'd LIKE to believe since studies have shown that prayer and being able to believe in something wholeheartedly can increase your general feeling of happiness, health and optimism of a possible outcome, but I don't think I will ever be able to.