When Connie showed up at the Lake Tahoe compound for the First Communion party, her children appeared to be 6-8 years old. The guy she had along in tow, and wanted to marry, would have been at least her third husband since Michael mentioned the "ink had not yet dried" on her previous divorce. Evidently she had been out living a wild life and had turned her back on Michael and the family, except when she needed money. So if Carlo's death was the start of her "hatred" for Michael, based on the age of her children it seems like several years had passed.