5 THE BEATLES “All You Need Is Love” Magical Mystery Tour (1967) GUITARIST: George Harrison
The shortest and most uptight solo of George’s Beatles career, with a jarringly abrupt ending. Maybe John Lennon realized it was only going to get worse and pulled the plug on him.
81 NAZARETH “Hair of the Dog” Hair of the Dog (1975) GUITARIST: Manny Charlton
Really, has there ever been a better hard rock chorus than “Now you’re messin’ with [stomp! stomp!] a son of a *****”? And has there ever been a more idiotic concept for a hard rock guitar solo than Manny Charlton’s interminable Talk Box excursion? The damn thing sounds like they let that duck from the Afflac commercial into the studio.
89 WHITE STRIPES “Offend in Every Way” White Blood Cells (2001) GUITARIST: Jack White
Slipshod playing is a big part of Jack White’s shtick and garagerock appeal, but it can’t hide the fact that White is struggling with this song’s simplistic riff. His phrasing meanders as if he’s trying to remember the riff, and the botched G chord roughly two minutes into the song is one of the most painful mistakes ever recorded. Only an attempt at a solo could have made this recording more offensive.
23 SMASHING PUMPKINS “Zero” Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness (1995) GUITARIST: Billy Corgan
Old Chinese saying: “Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Give a man a Whammy pedal and he’ll annoy you for a lifetime.” Just because you call yourself a zero doesn’t mean you have to play like one.
"When the snows fall and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives." Winter is Coming Now this is the Law of the Jungle—as old and as true as the sky; And the wolf that shall keep it may prosper, but the wolf that shall break it must die. As the creeper that girdles the tree-trunk, the Law runneth forward and back; For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.
