Gov. Christie breaks the GOP's heartEASTON, Md, September 28, 2011 — The Republican field has gone topsy-turvy on us. Who was up is now down. Who was down is on top. And everyone else is blown sideways.
Last Saturday’s Florida straw poll was supposed to be a crystal ball for the GOP future. Based on past history and conventional wisdom, whoever wins Florida’s straw pool will win the primary and ultimately be the Republican candidate in the general election. So according to that predictor, the straw poll picked Herman Cain in 2012.
What? Herman Cain? That can’t be, moaned the Party insiders, that just can’t be. Quick find us someone else. We used to be crazy for Michelle Bachman. Ok, ok, she is too nutty, even for us. So let’s go with Mitt Romney. No wait, Rick Perry is here. Rick’s our guy. Or is he? Ok, we got it, you voters want Mitt. What? Now you have a hankering for Herman Cain?
What’s the Grand Old Party to do? GOP pols are tearing their hair out and the moneymen don’t know what to do.
Calling Governor Chris Christie: come save us from ourselves. Oops, hold on. Looks like Christie won’t be answering the call of his Party or of the guys with enough loot to buy an election.
When Does No Not Mean No?
Of course, no matter how often Gov. Christie says it, no one seems to believe him. Cable’s talking heads, Right and Left, and political pros are parsing his words at the Reagan Library where he spoke Tuesday night. After all he didn’t come right out and say, “No,” did he?
Instead he sent everyone to a Politico video, a montage of Christie saying No a zillion times.
But did he actually use the word No that night? Not really. Just sort of.
And that speech sure sounded like one a candidate on the stump might make, including talking about foreign policy. Christie seemed to be trying to position himself as a different kind of Republican candidate. Was this his out of town tryout or was he just flapping his gums?
So will he or won’t he? That is the question. The one that won’t go away no matter what Christie says. For some people, but not for me. I never thought he would run. Not just because he said last November only committing suicide would convince people he’s not running.
After all, the number of politicians who have Lazarus moments, coming back from the dead to have another shot at a campaign, is legion. He’s not running because he doesn’t think this is his time.
Actually, I’m sorry the Jersey guy isn’t running. He would be much more fun to watch. He’s a bully. He’s got a nasty mouth. He shoots from the lip and asks questions later. He’s really fat, but nimble. He takes no guff. He never says he’s sorry because he’s not. He’s smart. And he ain’t afraid of nobody, no how.
He’s from Jersey.
Christie’s a little bit Tony Soprano and a little bit The Situation, if you know what I mean. I would have loved to see him up on the stage at the next debate. Newt Gingrich would have been toast. (Bachmann is already toast.) Christie would have eaten Romney’s lunch. And Perry? He would have found himself skewered on the end of a toothpick.
The candidates are undoubtedly breathing a sigh of relief. As for those moneymen, you know the ones from the SOB Club (Save Our Billionaires), they will try to slip back into the shadows once more. But we did get a glimpse of their faces as they made the pilgrimage to Trenton, New Jersey’s capital (how humiliating that must have been for these New York tycoons finding themselves actually in New Jersey and not just whizzing through in limos on their way to somewhere else).
Have Cash, Ready to Play
Here were the supplicants, on bended knees, humbling themselves to get Christie to save the GOP from other Republicans:
David H. Koch, industrialist and Tea Party moneyman
Kenneth G. Langone, the billionaire Home Depot founder
Paul E. Singer, hedge fund magnate
Charles R. Schwab, financial investor who touts himself as the friend of the little investor
David Tepper and Daniel S. Loeb, hedge fund managers
Then there is the interesting $1.5 million ad, sponsored by the Committee for Our Children’s Future, that is running in New Jersey, New York, and Pennsylvania. When is an ad just an ad and not a billboard for Christie for President?
Watch it yourself and decide (at the end of this column).
Now all of this, supposedly, is going on without Christie’s blessing. He just smiles appreciatively and says such things, as he did the other night at the Reagan Library to the woman who pleaded with him to run for the sake of her children and grandchildren:
“So my answer to you is just this: I thank you for what you’re saying, and I take it in, and I’m listening to every word of it, and feeling it too.”
He probably is “feeling it,” and with folks ready to smother him in campaign cash and love plus a weak GOP field, Christie might still be weighing his options. But it is doubtful, he will run. Despite the polls, President Obama’s goose is far from cooked. And Christie knows it.
If he’s anything, Christie is a realist. Remember he’s from Jersey.
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