I never felt that at all. I think it was pretty clear throughout the series that New Jersey didn't want to mess with New York if avoidable. The only reason NJ "won" is because Butchy agreed to a sit down because he felt his boss Phil Leotardo was being unreasonable, and then he gave the OK to whack Phil.
And I still feel that Tony was hit in the final episode and it was on New York's orders. With that in mind, along with Sil in a coma and Bobby dead, I don't know if NJ "won" anything in the end.