Two guys are in the Port Authority Bus Terminal in NYC, traveling to Pittsburgh. First guy says he'll buy tix for both. He walks to the ticket counter, where the clerk has her back to him. As she turns around, he's stunned by her huge, er, endowment.
"Yessss..." she says.
"Uh-uh-uh...two pickets to Titsburgh," he stammers, then runs away, too embarrassed to continue.

Second guy takes up the task. He walks up to the counter, the gal turns around, his eyes pop out, and he mumbles, "Uh-uh-uh...two pickets to Titsburgh." He, too, retires, much discomfited.

At that rate, the guys are never gonna get to Pittsburg. So they spot a minister in clerical garb and ask him to buy the tix. Sure, he says.

He goes to counter. The clerk turns around. "Two tickets to Pittsburgh," he states, handing over the cash clearly and confidently. She smiles and gives him the tickets. He leaves, then suddenly turns back, remembering he needs change for the pay phone.

"And by the way, can you give me two nipples for a dime?"