Accept this post as constructive criticism, this is not an attack.
First and foremost, will there be an actual script? This is just an outline.
Second - there is just way too much going on here. It doesn't need to be this tidy, everybody doesn't have to be connected. It is not "Six Degrees of Vito Corleone". I agree, it's okay for characters to come from "out of the blue".
In a word, convoluted.
"I have zero integrity and no backbone."
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