Last Friday, an English paper. It was suppose to be about pretty much anything in your life you wanted to write about. It had to have some depth and had to be about something in your life that was very relevant to your personality today. Well, as some of you may know, I am in the middle of dealing with a love of mine living 171 miles away, and, recently, I haven't been able to get her off my mind. Well, accordingly, i decided to write my paper about this girl, my first kiss, my first love.
Now, my mom found a copy and read it. I, firstly, felt very embarrassed. I mean, it explained things I didn't want my mom to read, but, she said that she loved the paper. She said that she even wanted to publish it in a magazine. At first, I was totally opposed to the idea. I would feel like a whore, selling my emotions for money. But then, I showed it to Olivia, the subject of the paper, and she said that I had to publish it-it was so great. Then I showed it to a very opinionated friend of mine, who wants to be a writer when she grows up, and she said it was excellent also, and should be published. I am still not sure if I am comfortable publishing it. So, I am going to show it to you guys, and I want some advice. Is it really that good? And, should I let my mom go and publish it?
Olive Oil Sunshine
I have had very few friends that I could relate to entirely. There have ben very few people, of no blood relation, that I have loved. I, in my 15 years of living, have only had one girlfriend, one love, one woman who encompassed my heart. Her name was Olivia V****, and she forever holds a piece of me I am proud to let her keep.
Deep in the Catskill Mountains, lie a small, two horse town, Cairo, New York. It was there I spent my summers, every summer, since my first. In "The Lazy 'J'", a small motel, privately owned by close friends of the family. Every year, we would see the same people, our family. One of the families that I knew very well, in fact the closest of them all, were the R********'s from Brooklyn. Yes, Terry, her late husband, Joe, and her two kids, Tamika, and Sherry. Tamika, only two years my senior, was always closer to me, though, I always felt more comfortable around the much more approachable Sherry, who now is in her 19th year of life. Life was good in the Catskills, it always was, more then a home away from home for me.
Then, things seemed to only get better in the summer of 2000. I was 11, and the R********'s were, ironically, warning me about a neighbor of theirs who would be headed to the motel the next week. "Her name is Olivia", they would tell me. They showed me pictures, I fell in love. But, I kept my mouth shut as they warned me about her. Though, they wouldn't tell me why. "Just, watch out, Eddie, she's a little weird sometimes" then they would laugh, I would laugh too, though I was dissatisfied with the answer. She was only a year younger then me, and I wanted to know more about her.
Well, it didn't take long before I found out for myself. I remember the first moment I laid eyes on her, in person, stepping out of her car. I greeted her, I was shy, but so was she. Though, I never opened up to anyone as quickly as I did to her. By that night, I felt as though I knew her my whole life. We were watching television, playing cards, just sitting by the open field, basking in the sunset over the tree covered hills. However, something was missing, Tamika, and Sherry. We didn't care though. The seconds, minutes, hours I would spend with her flew by me like a hurricane. I had, absolutely no worries. And then, it seemed as though, it was only seconds in between the time she stepped out of her car and when I stepped into mine, though, we all had an entire week to ourselves.
Now, it’s a three hour drive between Cairo, New York and Johnston, Rhode Island, and I don't believe a minute went by when I didn't have her on my mind. I thought back to playing badminton with her, swinging on the swings, just conversing with her, feeling her presence, and loving it. Of course, we traded phone numbers, e-mail, and home addresses. And, I spoke to her as often as I could, for quite a few months. And then, sadly, we grew apart.
The next year went by, and, sadly, she wasn't up at Cairo the same week I was. I was with Tamika and Sherry, though, all was good. I was over Olivia. And it seemed as though this sparked my interest even farther into speaking with her. The swings we shared, the grass we grazed, it all reminded me of my little olive oil and the sunshine we shared. When I went home that summer, we began talking again, and didn't stop until the next summer rolled around. I wasn't over Olivia, I was far from getting over.
Yes, the summer of 2002 was a good summer, I grew closer and closer to Olivia, and she soon became my closest friend. I told her secrets I could tell no one else. I could tell her anything, and she could me. It was though our brains were on the same wave link. Almost as though, our minds clicked, and we understood each other perfectly, in every sense. Of course, we stayed in touch all of that year, though, this time around, I felt as though I was falling in love with her. Now, I was 13, turning 14 in the summer of 2003, and I had felt just so many times before that I was “in love”. But, this was different. I knew, there was something different about Olivia. I couldn't tell it, I couldn't write it, I could not express in any shape or form what kind of emotion I was feeling, but, I just knew in my heart, that this was love.
Of course, the summer of 2003, was the best of them all. It was the summer of my first kiss. I remember, I spent every moment of the entire vacation with the love of my life, Olivia. However, all of the time we spent together caused pretty much everyone there to turn against us. The R********'s were mad because they were set aside like outcasts, my grandparents were mad because, well, because Olivia was Puerto Rican and Columbian. And my mother was a little mad because I was spending little time with the family and too much time doing "God knows what" with Olivia. It seemed as though, her parents were the only ones who understood our compatibility, and were the only adults I could really get along with the entire vacation. Tony and Gloria truly were, my second parents. I could honestly say that I could go to them with a problem before I could go to my own mother.
They seemed to be our only allies in this Romeo and Juliet relationship. However, it was this allegiance that forced the R********s and V****s to take bart in a bitter feud. One that eventually led Olivia and her family to move out of Brooklyn, New York, and off to seek a better life in suburbia, New Jersey, “The Garden State”.
Still, in the middle of all this pain and confusion, while upstate, our strong love and respect for each other kept us together. The night before we were both to head back to our homes, miles away, we both sat on the couch in my motel room. It was dark out, and the adults were relaxing, having coffee and cake in the lounge room . So, we sat there, with the radio on, talking. It was the most romantic feeling I have ever had, in possibly, the least romantic place. Everything was dated about 30 years, there was a sticky fly catcher hanging by the door, and the radio was a small white boom box, my grandfather's still scratchy and fuzzy, playing dated hits. It reeked of old spaghetti, left overs from hours earlier. But, I don't believe either of us realized any of I this. The emotions I felt were raging with joy, love, excitement, nervousness. And before I knew it, lips were touching hers. And a kiss that lasted, maybe a few seconds, lasted eternity for me. I was one with the woman I loved and respected most in my life. Soon, though, I heard the lounge room door close. I pulled away, and was ecstatic to see the most uplifting smile on her face.
When my grandparents entered the room, it was Olivia's que to go back to her room. It was late, and we all had a long ride ahead of us the next day. I kissed her, gently on the forehead as she rose, lightly enough for my grandmother to be oblivious. I then whispered in her ear, "I love you", and then she left. That night, I lye in bed, sleepless. I wanted to drift away to dreamland so much, just so I could be closer to Olivia, at least in a fantasy world. In stead, I spent the night, heart racing, blood pumping, emotions running wild like a herd of stampeding elephants.
The next morning, we were saying our goodbyes to everybody, and I stole one last kiss from Olivia, and finally heard the words I've been waiting so long to hear. "I love you.." she said and I hugged her. I never wanted to let go, but I did. And, moments later, where gone, off in to separate directions.
That, was the last time I actually saw her. But, we never lost touch. We tried keeping a long distance relationship, but we decided to discontinue it before either of us got hurt. She never revisited "The Lazy 'J'", after her parents and the R********s’, the V****s’ only door to Cairo, began their feud, yet to be resolved. She lives in New Jersey, now, and, sadly, too many unfortunate things are happening to her now. I, 171 miles away, try my hardest to help her, and I think, I hope I am. But there are some things you can only work out with yourself. She is surrounded by a world so different then the peaceful Catskills, so much more cruel and real, however, she is strong, and I have faith that she will pull through.
However, we have both grown so much from that first summer in the Catskills together. We have changed, matured, into different people. The strong bond will always be there, our friendship and love will never be lost, but, perhaps, our friendship is too weak for a relationship, perhaps too strong. Perhaps, never again, will I ever lay on the open field, watching the sun set behind the tree covered hills, beside my love. Perhaps, I, in 2 years or so, am forced to go elsewhere, for whatever reason, instead of heading to New Jersey, to live “happily ever after”. Perhaps, is a big word, but, it can't possibly end the story of my first, and so far, only love, Olivia, my dearest Olivia.
For obvious reaons, all surnames were blocked. Thanks in advanced for all your advice.
