If the characters in the trilogy had stuck to these, some things might have turned out differently...

Each of these characters resolves to

Luca Brasi: Stay out of bars after closing time
Frank Pentangelli: Stay out of bars before they open
Johnny Ola: Stay off those drafty hotel room balconies
Appolonia: Not drive the car until obtaining a license
Paulie Gatto: Not let anyone block the rear-view mirror
Fredo Corleone: Try three at a time
Kay Corleone: Make no more visits to the abortion clinic
Carlo Rizzi: Not fight with Connie anymore
Peter Clemenza: Lay off the cannolis
Captain McCluskey: Lay off the Italian food
Senator Geary: Stay out of the brothels
Buscetta: Learn English
Phillip Tattaglia: Not fraternize with the help
Moe Greene: Not get so many massages
Cuneo: Get more exercise by using the stairs
Stracchi: Stay out of revolving doors
Connie Corleone: Try some new cannoli recipies
B.J. Harrison: Spend less time in the sun
Grace Hamilton: Not go home with a man the first night

For all the characters: STAY AWAY FROM ORANGES!

Sonny Corleone: Never tell anyone outside the family what you're thinking again.

Hyman Roth: Make sure to request your absentee ballot earlier.

Jack Woltz: Learn laundry tips on how to remove bloodstains from sheets.

El Presidente Batista: Start looking for a new job.

Feliz Ano Nuevo!

i'm even scared or fruit stands now, i was in roma last week and they had frutivendolos everywhere, so much beautiful oranges, bananas and apples. i kept making references to the movie when i'd stop at a stand and no one got the joke. bastards.

Plawrence you crack me up with these threads...and before Buscetta learns a language he'd better learn some sign language.

PLawrence, you are a specialist in jokes and bluffs
I always get hit at school because of my terrible jokes, invented by me

What about
Rocco: never volunteer for suicide missions, because someone will take you up on it.

Mary: if you have gotten a life and stop chasing your cousin, you would have been alive today.
Chainsaw 1
Chainsaw 2

Better a pear than an orange eh? Deathkiss your sig line cracks me up!

Fabrizio - Use a bike

Fredo - Get a new hobby

Don Tommasino - Stop offering rides to strangers

Good one. And welcome.

Fredo: Spend some time at a shooting range.
Merle: Get a job
Tattaglia: a new hair do with less oil.
Clemenza: try the Atkins diet.

Sonny: Get an EZ Pass

FFC: Never make more than one sequel

funny how no-one thinks Michael or Vito ever did anything wrong!


Plawrence, this is the most original topic in weeks, if not in months!!

if not for the newyears resotions, then for you welcoming Special Kay to the board (signed up December 2002, at last years resolutions thread )

Barzini - Don't park in no-parking zones.

micheal- get an understanding wife

Strachi-Get some exercise, use the stairs.
Vito-Check both ways before crossing the street.

Kay - get a trustworthy husband whose son's you'll be proud to bring into the world.



AppleOnYa

Khartoum - to bet with his head, not over it.