Post deleted by I'M GERMAN-IRISH

Good 'ol boys bleed too.

Dear Am I Irish or German, never apologize for pointless speculation. It is the life blood of this BB. What if Sunny had supernatural powers and bullets bounced off his chest? What if the Corleones lived in Restoration England would they have worn powdered wigs? Fredo certainly.This type of thing is seriously discussed all the time.

You do make a good point however "good old boys" could have gotten the better of Vito et al. Think about Bert Reynolds in Smoky and the Bandit.Do you think he would had driven into an ambush like Sunny? No way.The heros of the "Dukes of Hazzard" would never had submitted to a congessional hearing.They would have hopped into their car with Daisy Mae and treated those senators to a high speed chase they would never forget.
I know you are new to this BB but you are quickly becoming an old pro.

I would pay to see Miss Kitty kick Mama Corleone's ass.

If anyone tried to butt in, Miss Kitty could point her finger and say, "Don't interfere".

I'd like to see a fight between Hoss Cartright and Luca Brasi.

My money's on Hoss. How about Little Joe and Sonny. Those Cartrights are a few steps above Carlo?

I'd like to see Hop Sing give Clemenza a cooking lesson.

Who knows, if Hop Sing puts Clemenza's wine in his recipes maybe the Cartright's might score some women.

I think Ben could beat the hell out of Vito.

Speakikng of Ben, who was marrried more times..Ben Cartwright or Connie Corleone?

You guys are toooooooo much!

Remember the Patrick Swayze movie "Next of Kin"? That may answer the question for us.

But the image of Vito riding a horse, Connie in a mountain wedding with its bluegrass music, Revenuers taking down license plates, Fredo with several front teeth missing, and all the people from Hooterville in attendance - yes, those good ol boys might just give them cityfolk a lickin'.

The Cartwrights vs. the Corleones brings up some interesting matches. Going in age order:

Ben vs. Vito - In the short run it looks like Ben would win in a fight, but Vito couldn't be counted out.... he'd get his revenge at a later date (probably catching Ben off-guard). WINNER: Corleone

Adam vs. Sonny - In what would be a close fight Sonny's violent temper would carry him to victory over the more subdued Adam. WINNER: Corleone

Hoss vs. Fredo - Even though the novel describes Fredo as the toughest of the kids you must take into account the "movie" Fredo.... Regardless, he'd get the beans beat out of him by that mountain-of-a-man, Hoss. WINNER: Cartwright

Little Joe vs. Michael - The closest bout. Both fighters of same size. Mike untested in hand-to-hand "combat", while Little Joe has had a history of some fights. WINNER: TIE

How about


Sheriff Coffee vs. McCluskey

Candy v. Carlo

Man, Apple is gonna love this thread.

Some interesting parallels there, except that three of the four Corleone men were married.

I'm reminded of the scene in the Barry Levinson film Tin Men, and danny DeVito's crew is sitting in the diner discussing TV shows, and DeVito makes some funny commenst about how bemn cartwright had three sons with three different wives who "all died in childbirth."

Gotta see if I can find the quote....

I remember this scene, which I always thought as one of the funniest in the movie:

Sam: You know when I saw 'Bonanza' the other day, something occurred to me.

Ernest Tilley: Eh?

Sam: Ya got these four guys living on the Ponderosa and ya never hear them say anything about wanting to get laid.

Ernest Tilley: Huh.

Sam: I mean ya never hear Hoss say to Little Joe, "I had such a hard-on when I woke up this morning."

Ernest Tilley: No, no, no...

Sam: They don't talk about broads - nothing. Ya never hear Little Joe say, "Hey, Hoss, I went to Virginia City and I saw a girl with the greatest ass I've ever seen in my life." They just walk around the Ponderosa: "Yes, Pa, where's Little Joe?" Nothin' about broads. I don't think I'm being too picky. But, if at least once, they talked about getting horny. I don't care if you live on the Ponderosa or right here in Baltimore, guys talk about getting laid. I'm beginning to think that show doesn't have too much realism.





Don Cardi

By and large, I'd give the overall edge to the Cartwrights. They're no push-over band leaders, but I think Ben and Vito would hit it off well.
If Sonny could knock off Hoss early, it would tilt the balance of power, but Hoss is much tougher than Bruno Tattaglia.

On the other hand, the Corleones would have no problem with the Douglas men from "My Three Sons." Can you see Fred MacMurray in his ever calm voice saying, "Who put the horse head under the blanket, Chip?"

If you throw in Uncle Charlie though, it's a toss-up.

Now if they were matched against the Munsters...

What about between The Munsters and The Adams Family? My money's on Cousin It.

Herman, Lerch, and Luca Brasi?
Luca has the speed, Lerch has the strength, and Herman has the brains...I'm going with Herman.

I don't know about any yahoos, hayseeds or good ol' boys, but I reckon William Shatner would have the whole family quivering.

He would bring in Scotty,and Uhura and the gang,and break out the laser guns,witch Vito would not expect.Then,like a fool,Sonny would charge at Shatner like he was gonna disarm him,and then Sonny would get fried.Then,Spock would put a mind hold on Vito,to asurp control.Fredo would be in the background saying "Wow ol'Spock knows that trick like the back of his hand." Once Micheal heard that he realizes that Fredo broke his heart,and send in Al to kill Fredo and Shatner and his crew.But then Spock controlld Vito would take Al from behind,while Scotty zapped him.While Shatners'crew are busy fighting Luca Brasi and Hagen and everyone,Micheal and Shatner would go at it.Micheal would get nasty and snarl "COME ON,NO GUNS....." and they brawl! Micheal shure knows how to fight dirty,after being in the Mariens. But Shatner knows all the alien fight moves so,he takes him down.So,after most of the Corleons are either dead or on the floor groaning,Shatner and his gang head out.Not before Shatner yells a mighty,"Denny Crane!!!!!!" They all ride off on their horses.THA END.OR IS IT? Whatever.

This is the funniest thread I've read in a long time.

What would happen if the Corleones moved to Mayberry?

I can't see Andy saying "I thoght I got all yuou guinea

hoods locked up."

And while we are on the subject there was another show with a bunch of singel guys who never talked about gettting laid. In fact it may be the gayest show in history.

Floyd the Barber -- a flamer

Howard Sprague -- Single guy lived with mom...

Andy and Barney -- a little too close for comfort...Helen and Thelma Lou were lesbian beards.

Gomer Pyle ...need I say more?

They should rename the town Gayberry.

If you lived in a town where the women looked like Aunt Bea, you'd be spending time with Barney Fife too?

Speaking of Mayberry and the Corleones, can you see Michael making a move on Floyd's barber shop?

M: You're unlucky.

F: What? Oh no-no-no...you think-you think I'm skimming off the top?

M: No you're taking too much off the top and not getting Otis' sideburns straight. I could do better. My credit good enough to buy me out?

F: You cut my hair-oh no-no-no. I cut your hair. I'm Floyd the Barber. I've been giving crew cuts since your daddy was gutting Don Ciccio! I take Fredo in when you're having a tough time...

M: Is that why you shaved the side of his head.

Fredo: Wait Mike, me and Floyd are good friends.

F: I had to. He wouldn't sit still in the chair.
(Exit Floyd)

Fredo: Mike, you don't come to Mayberry and talk to a man like Floyd the Barber like that.
(Enter Gomer Pyle)

Gomer: Shazam, Fredo. That guy you're talking to looks just like Al Pacino.

Actually, there was an episode of Star Trek where they go back in time to Chicago and Kirk becomes a Mob Boss with Spock as his second in command. It takes place in the 20's with the cars, suits and all the other props from the 20's. It's titled 'A Piece Of The Action.'


Don Cardi

Remember it well. Classic episode.

'Course, if Chuck Norris walked into town, both Shatner and the Corleones would definitely flee in terror!

Michael in Mayberry


Andy - I thought we'd be alone.
Michael - I trust these men with my life Sheriff it would be an insult to ask them to leave.
Andy- Well I intend to speak candidly to you...
Michael (gestures)
Andy I hear your making a move on the Mayberry Hotel and Floyd's Barber Shop.
Michael - Fife's a good man.
Andy - The zoning for the hotel is grandfathered in so you'll have no problem there, but you don't have a barber's license so you can't get the shop without one. But you can get one for $200,000 and five per cent of the gross of the hotel and the shop's revenues..... including the money Floyd makes in his back room bookie operation.
Michael - Now why would I pay $200,000 for a one chair barber shop when the cost of a barber's license is $2.50?
Andy - Cause I intend to squeeze you. I don't like your people coming here to this lovely small town with your oily hair and your shiny silk suits...you and your whole fucking family.
Michael - You and I are part of the same hippocrisy, Sherrif Taylor, but never think it applies to my family.
Andy- All right, you play your little games, and I'll play mine but I want your answer by tomorrow, and another thing. Never contact me again. You go through Fife.
Michael - You can have my answer now. The answer is nothing. And I'd appreciate it if you would pick up the license fee and bring me and my men a dozen of Aunt Bee's home made pies.

Remember, there was an episode of the AGS where some gangsters moved into Floyd's shop to take bets on horses. And the episode where Barney yelled out "We defy the Mafia."

There was also the memorable SNL skit when Ron Howard hosted about how Mayberry beame a den of inequity after he left town. I believe in that one Aunt Bea became a Madam, etc. The idea of Andy and the mob though is an intriguing idea.

I remember this scene, which I always thought as one of the funniest in the movie:

Sam: You know when I saw 'Bonanza' the other day, something occurred to me.

Ernest Tilley: Eh?

Sam: Ya got these four guys living on the Ponderosa and ya never hear them say anything about wanting to get laid.

Ernest Tilley: Huh.

Sam: I mean ya never hear Hoss say to Little Joe, "I had such a hard-on when I woke up this morning."

Ernest Tilley: No, no, no...

Sam: They don't talk about broads - nothing. Ya never hear Little Joe say, "Hey, Hoss, I went to Virginia City and I saw a girl with the greatest ass I've ever seen in my life." They just walk around the Ponderosa: "Yes, Pa, where's Little Joe?" Nothin' about broads. I don't think I'm being too picky. But, if at least once, they talked about getting horny. I don't care if you live on the Ponderosa or right here in Baltimore, guys talk about getting laid. I'm beginning to think that show doesn't have too much realism.





Don Cardi [/QB][/QUOTE]


Actually I think All three Cartwright "boys" got engaged about fifty times, but their fiancees always died right before the wedding.
LOL

Do you think that Marshall Matt Dillon from Gunsmoke could kick McCluskey's ass