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Rutgers Suicide #582058
10/01/10 01:58 PM
10/01/10 01:58 PM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 8,224
New Jersey
AppleOnYa Offline OP
AppleOnYa  Offline OP

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 8,224
New Jersey
Have to admit, I'm surprised nobody has yet brought this up (I suppose that's what Fame was talking about).

Terrible story, and I personally feel the two students responsible should be prosecuted to the fullest extent on the invasion of privacy charges.

There's apparently some talk as to if they can be charged with hate crime or whatever, because the boy being gay was a factor in the filming. Not sure that is the road to go down...what was done to this student could've been done to anyone, anywhere regardless of sexual orientation or even what they were doing. It probably has been, with the only difference that a suicide wasn't the result. The minor fact that these two of course never dreamed their victim would react by jumping off a bridge is clear indication that young people who think this kind've thing is nothing more than a hilarious joke need to be shown that it is not hilarious, it is cruel and thoughtless and can ruin lives....even if it doesn't result in the end of a life.

I talked with my daughter about this yesterday...even though she is only 11 I really want her to understand before entering her teen years what it means to be so unbelievably inconsiderate of the feelings and privacy of others...and how even though such cruelty has always been around, in this amazing age of texting and instant webcasts and global internet and youtube, the consequences can be so much longer lasting and farther reaching.

I feel for the two students and their parents & families...becuase they could not have imagined what would happen. I'm sure they are sorry, and if they had it do do over again would not. But sorry, that's not enough not to not have their actions made an examples of, so from here on in they deserve whatever punishment they get.

Yet another streamofconsciousness I admit...but this story has gotten to me, and it should get to alot of people.

Apple


A wise and frugal government, which shall leave men free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned - this is the sum of good government.

- THOMAS JEFFERSON

Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: AppleOnYa] #582060
10/01/10 02:15 PM
10/01/10 02:15 PM
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 6,762
Anytown, USA
goombah Offline
goombah  Offline

Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 6,762
Anytown, USA
Though they are not at the age yet, I also worry about my kids with the "cyber bullying" that has been occurring with too much regularity. I agree that the roommate and other person involved should be held accountable. This is a sad example of how one person's insensitivity and the suicide victim both took their actions too far to an extreme.

Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: AppleOnYa] #582061
10/01/10 02:15 PM
10/01/10 02:15 PM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 466
Stewartstown, PA
V
VitoC Offline
Capo
VitoC  Offline
V
Capo
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 466
Stewartstown, PA
While I certainly agree that what happened was terrible, and that taping this kid having sex was a horrible invasion of privacy, I think it should be noted that the attitude displayed by the students taping was not very different from that which the news media routinely takes, particularly toward celebrities and other public figures. Star magazine, for example, sees absolutely nothing wrong with publishing the supposed private text messages of Ashton Kutcher to his lover. And the general public doesn't seem to see anything wrong with it either. Why? How is it anyone's business who Ashton is having sex with? Why do we have a "right to know" just because he's famous? Yes, it's human nature to be particularly curious about the lives of celebrities. But that doesn't me we have a right to invade their lives to satisfy our curiosity.

I don't think there's any way to justifying violating the privacy of anyone, whether anonymous person or celebrity, unless it concerns something that could clearly harm the rest of us.


Let me tell ya somethin my kraut mick friend!
Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: VitoC] #582066
10/01/10 03:55 PM
10/01/10 03:55 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
Apple, SC brought it up on the News thread, and, like you, I was surprised it didn't get more of a reaction.

I can't imagine what sort of pain poor Tyler must have been in to have jumped off the GWB. As a parent, I have been so disturbed for all involved. I don't even know if I can comment coherently.

Apple, discussing this openly with your daughter was a good idea. If more parents did, then perhaps bullying wouldn't be so rampant. Sure, there was and always will be bullying, but I don't remember it being so venomous.


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: Sicilian Babe] #582067
10/01/10 04:38 PM
10/01/10 04:38 PM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,414
Bar Vitelli, Queens, NY
Signor Vitelli Offline
Underboss
Signor Vitelli  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,414
Bar Vitelli, Queens, NY
Actually, I had not checked that other thread in several days, so I was unaware of SC's post.

I was horrified to hear about this on the local news. My heart absolutely goes out to the boy's family; what an incredible tragedy.

On some level, many people now feel any and all "rules" that were adhered to in the past no longer apply. Films like that "Jackass" crap come to mind. Be gross, be a moron, be inconsiderate of others - what the hell, it's fun.

Whatever happened to the idea that what goes on in somebody's bedroom - whether "celebrity" or "civilian" - is nobody's damn business?

In my opinion, those two students are absolutely morally responsible for Tyler's death. Not legally, of course, but definitely morally. His blood will be on their hands for the rest of their lives. And while I'm sure they are remorseful now over what occurred, all the "I'm sorrys" in the world won't bring that boy back.

I'm really sick in my heart over this. Such a horrible tragedy, and all because of a stupid idea that someone thought was "funny."

Signor V.


"For me, there's only my wife..."

"Sure I cook with wine - sometimes I even add it to the food!"

"When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies?"

"It was a grass harp... And we listened."

"Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it? Every, every minute?"

"No. Saints and poets, maybe... they do some."


Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: Signor Vitelli] #582071
10/01/10 05:21 PM
10/01/10 05:21 PM
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 5,325
MI
Lilo Offline
Lilo  Offline

Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 5,325
MI
So far the men allegedly involved in this situation at Duke haven't acted out or given statements as far as I know. And given social mores it's likely that the woman will get more opprobrium.

But if one guy , perhaps a guy with a bad review or who was ridiculed, lost it and went over the edge a la Rutgers , do people think the Duke co-ed would bear responsibility?


"When the snows fall and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives."
Winter is Coming

Now this is the Law of the Jungleā€”as old and as true as the sky; And the wolf that shall keep it may prosper, but the wolf that shall break it must die.
As the creeper that girdles the tree-trunk, the Law runneth forward and back; For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.
Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: Lilo] #582075
10/01/10 05:32 PM
10/01/10 05:32 PM
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 8,766
South of the Pinelands
MaryCas Offline
MaryCas  Offline

Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 8,766
South of the Pinelands
Bullying takes many forms and this is one of them; humiliation. My daughter is a teacher and she has seen many forms of bullying and she tells me about them. It's crass, insensitive and unacceptable behavior. Society is crumbling. Jesus Christ gave us the 11th commandment: Love one another as I have loved you. So simple, yet so hard for many to do.


Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, whoever humbles himself will be exalted - Matthew 23:12
Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: MaryCas] #582122
10/01/10 11:07 PM
10/01/10 11:07 PM
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 11,797
Pennsylvania
klydon1 Offline
klydon1  Offline

Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 11,797
Pennsylvania
This story is unspeakably sad. There is no doubt that the pair, who recorded Tyler, did so with the intent to expose him to ridicule and humiliation that would last beyond his college years. This can not be considered a prank by any stretch.

It's hard enough for 18 year olds to deal with college, life,, relationships, but cruelstunts like this make it unimaginable.

Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: klydon1] #582124
10/01/10 11:25 PM
10/01/10 11:25 PM
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 22,902
New York
SC Offline
Consigliere
SC  Offline
Consigliere

Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 22,902
New York
Originally Posted By: klydon1
There is no doubt that the pair, who recorded Tyler, did so with the intent to expose him to ridicule and humiliation that would last beyond his college years.


I object.... counsel is leading the witness!

Joking aside, I didn't pay too much attention to this story when it "broke" last week. I hadn't heard about the suicide until a few days ago. I, at first, thought it was a prank and wondered what the fuss was about. Later I heard that it was regarding a homosexual affair, and the suicide involved. That changed a lot for me.

I am now hearing that the girl that is involved is claiming that she is an innocent pawn in this.


.
Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: SC] #582192
10/02/10 08:47 PM
10/02/10 08:47 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
I saw a video of Tyler playing the violin. It was heart-wrenching on so many levels. He had talent, and you wonder what he might have become. I can't imagine what it's like for his parents to know that they will never see their son again, to hear his voice, his laughter, to hear him play his violin.

To lose a child is painful beyond belief. To lose one in such a public and horrible way? More painful? How more painful could it be? Did he prefer death to letting the world know his secret? What does this say about the human race? That a boy would rather plunge to his death than let people know he was gay? How intolerant are we?


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: Sicilian Babe] #582243
10/03/10 03:45 PM
10/03/10 03:45 PM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 8,224
New Jersey
AppleOnYa Offline OP
AppleOnYa  Offline OP

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 8,224
New Jersey
While admittedly we'll never know...it's possible that this young man's problem was NOT that he wished to hide his homoxualality (which would've been his choice and his right)...but the utterly cruel, humiliating and irriversible way in which it was exposed. He was a college Freshman, who may one day have come out on his own, given the chance to mature and be comfortable with his sexuality. Or maybe not. The point is, his choices were TAKEN AWAY by this roommate. THAT may just be what he couldn't live with.

Again though, to make this tragedy a 'gay' issue is in my opinion going down the exact wrong road. Focus MUST be made on the blatant invasion of this young man's privacy first in the filming and then of the webcasting it all over the internet. What kind of a cold, unfeeling creep would do such a thing and NOT consider what a horrible effect it would have...even if it didn't turn out to be suicide.

By the way, something I've heard no one mention in all the coverage...what about Tyler's partner? HIS privacy was invaded as well, he was just as much a victim. (Another thing this brilliant roommate apparently failed to either care about or take into account.) I'll be interested to see as the case unfolds if this young man takes a role.


A wise and frugal government, which shall leave men free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned - this is the sum of good government.

- THOMAS JEFFERSON

Re: Rutgers Suicide [Re: AppleOnYa] #582249
10/03/10 05:37 PM
10/03/10 05:37 PM
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 4,595
fathersson Offline
Underboss
fathersson  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 4,595

Media is playing this for all that they can get out of the story. Using the Gay issue as a major play in this young mans losing his life.

I think this young man had other issues that may have caused him to take his own life. Pressure of life, living up to his or other people goals or any or all kinds of things.

I don't think it was anyone surprise that this young man was or could be gay. So many people are, there is no need to hide as in years past. And in today's world when things are so in the open about people and their sexual lifestyle why would this need to cause his death unless there was other issues in his mind making him hurt so bad.

He was caught on tape having sex, then went online for days in a gay mans forum asking and talking to people on what he should do. Looking for things to get back at his roommate, which included throwing pink paint over his roommates person things. Then, went right back and planned another night in the room, asking the roommate once again for the room for the evening. Where he found the video set up once again,
just like he thought he would.

Sure this is all a shame, but this is a lot more then a guy just being outed.

Last edited by fathersson; 10/03/10 05:51 PM.

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