Tony owns the house, he bought it and he pays the bills, carmella dosent have a job, all she does is sit on her ass and complain. So how is it that she can kick tony out of his own house????

When you're married, basically everything becomes 50/50 owned. Technically Tony has a right to stay there too, but then both sides get lawyers, and the woman usually gets a temporary restraining order, getting the husband out of the house anyway. The laws are different in each State too.

thats ridiculous, so if tony decided to move out for good and sell the house he could get sued by his wife for not takin care of her? damn that sucks. if it were me i would take the kids and leave the bitch on her own, shes the one that wanted him out of the house in the first place.

That's kind of a hard quetion to answer Don Pope, because it's hard not to think in "reality" terms, even tho this is a fictional situation.

First of all, I won't dispute that Carmella has it made financially and materialistically. If this was a "real" character, she might tell you that she's been the one to keep the family together, so to speak and been the primary caretaker of the home and children. Ok, Tony does care about his kids, but it's Carmella, who if you notice, is always cooking (notice, I don't say cleaning, as I'm sure they have a house cleaner) and tending to the household and needs of the children, for the most part.

Now, In reality (at least in California), and I know thru experience, whenever there are minor children involved, the wife and the children get the option of staying in the house, so as not to upset the children's life anymore than necessary . Of course too, in California, if the wife stays in the house, the payment of the house is then her responisibility. Don't know if that's the case in other states.

I am assuming that many women with children, who divorce and had no job would take issue with you as far as sitting on their ass, as raising children, especially alone is not always an easy task, whether you have money or not.

Not coming down you you D.Pope, really. I guess this kind of thing just touches a nerve somewhat. Then again, this is the Sopranos we are talking about, and Tony usually gets what he's after, so we just may see Carmella kicked to the curb, who knows.

TIS

i understand what you mean by her taking care of the kids and cooking etc. i know that is alot of hard work, i guess i went to far by saying she "sits on her ass" but tony is the one who is paying for everything, if it wasnt for tony, taking care of the kids would not be. and the cooking she does would not be either cuz tony is the one actually buying the food.

In simplistic terms, here is how it pretty much works here in NJ. Unless the mother is unfit, she is going to get the kids. All the assets are split 50/50. They could either sell the house and split the profits, or the lawyers can work out a deal for Carmella or Tony to keep the house. Tony would also be paying child support, and also be paying alimony to support his wife until if/when she gets remarried. As for while they're seperated, all Carmella has to do is claim she feels threatened by Tony, and the judge will give her a restraining order, and Tony's ass is out of the house.

That's right Just Lou. I forgot to mention in my post that the house is either sold and profits split, or one party can buy the other party out. Everything is 50/50. I didn't know how many other states had that. I know in some states the husband continues to make the house payment even tho he doesn't even live in the house.


TIS

IMO Carmela has every right to throw Tony out.

She goes to AJ's swimming galas when Tony "can't make it." She cooks food for the family most nights. She puts her children before everything--EVERYthing. She lives with the fact that her husband screws every other gumar every night he stays out late, and then makes his dinner for him ready coming in the next day. She resisted temptation with Father Phil and then later with Furio, with her marriage and kids in thought.

True, Tony brings money to the Family (illegally, I may add) but honestly, what else has he done? He relies on that sole fact to keep himself in the house.

Pitiful.

Mick

dont matter how he got the money, the point is he pays for EVERYTHING. If it wasnt for the money he makes carmella wouldnt be making any dinners at all. And taking care of the family would be very difficult. and she did cheat on tony with that painting guy too. And she fantisized with furio.which is cheating "mentally"

Oops, sorry! I didn't realise merely thinking about somebody else because you're married to a guy who commits adultery every other night was wrong. :rolleyes:

How Tony makes a living does come into the equation when he is using it as an excuse to stay together. Fine, let him make money, but does that justify the fact that he stays in the Bada Bing and Casinos until late in the morning and is in bed until the afternoon the following day? No, it doesn't.

Thoughout the entire Season Four Tony becomes increasingly distanced from Carmela, and he simply takes their marriage for granted. He doesn't listen to Carm about finances, an important part of marriage (granted, he does accept Cousin Brian's proposals after a while), he had an affair with Svetlana, Valentina, and less money was coming in from the Family's business.

I think that Furio fled to control his temptation. But had he stayed, I don't think Carm would have succumbed to the temptation anyway; she simply loved knowing the fact that she had "power" over Tony in the fact that she could, if she wanted to, have an affair so easily.

When Irina called, Carm had reached breaking point, and the fact that Furio, the only person in her life which gave her "pleasure" (though not physically of course), had left, accentuated all the bad things that came to her mind about Tony.

Of course, I love Tony as a character, and I was actually emotionally shocked when Season Four's finale ended, but when you think about it Carmela had just grounds IMO.

Mick

Don Pope,

Boy, you're a tough nut to crack. Again, keeping in mind these are fictional characters, and for storyline purposes, who knows what would happen, but I must turn to reality a bit to make a point.

A marriage legally is a "joint" partnership and anything acquired by a couple during their marriage "is" what we call community property. Doesn't matter who made the money. A judge will consider the longevity of the marriage and the children to make the determination. Since Tony and Carmella have a long term marriage, everything would be split down the middle. That's the law, unfair or not.

There have been divorces where the woman has worked for years to put a spouse thru Medical school and paid for everything, then when there is a divorce wants to be paid back. That doesn't happen either. I would hate to be in a marriage where it's my money & your money, no matter who earned it. It should be both.

Also, I'm not one of those male "bashhers" either and never have been. But how can you compare Carmella's indiscretions with Tony's? I don't condone them, but in my view she is much more "moral" than Tony.


TIS

[/qb][/QUOTE]Oops, sorry! I didn't realise merely thinking about somebody else because you're married to a guy who commits adultery every other night was wrong. :rolleyes:

dont get all defensive i was just stating my opinion

Don Pope,

Not defensive, but by your first sentence, you answered my question: "How can you compare Carmella's indescretions with Tony's" That was my point. It's quite different fantasing and actually following thru with your fantasies. One can tear apart a marriage where as the other won't.


TIS

TIS that statment i made about being defensive was to Capo.

But are you guys trying to say that just cuz tony cheats on carmella means its alright for carmella do go ahead and do the same? i understand how tony cheats on her all the time, but if i were tony i would be very upset if my wife were fantasizing about another man.

I'm not saying it's right, but she has every right to. Carm's throwing Tony out is fully justifiable when you think about it. On first thoughts, when it first finished, I hated Carmela for doing it, but that's because of the terrific acting on Falco and Gandolfini's parts.

Mick

If you ever get married, you better get a prenup.

you damn right i will!

I had to write this after i saw this
episode,i do not condone what tony
has done as far as the cheating goes.
He will probobly not change no matter
what the circumstances,I also do not take
carmellas side here either.She by no means
is innocent in this situation.She leads
a very glamerous lifestyle,one many women
only can dream of.Tony is the earner here
by choice,but her spending of"blood-money"
only shows her as a person in denial.
She knew what time it was when they hooked
up,she knew of his other life when they
married.
It was his money putting meadow through school
and his money that lets her drive a mercedes.
It was his jersey connectioons that helped
her fathers business w/zoning problems.
Yes she cooks,no cleaning though and her
on again off again relationship w/her kids
is amazing,her punishment tactics are a joke
and her lack of understanding for her kids
is quite obvious and overshadowed by her
constant depressed state.
Last but not least,did she not STEAL 40,000
from tony and lie about it,from her own
husband she did this.So what is worse,
cheating or stealing?If she is not happy move
out,get a job get re-married,see what life
is really like on the out-side,reality is
a cruel thing.
Screw the house,if I'm tony I buy the other
house,the kids are old enough to make up
there own minds and what they want.

I agree completely!

Tony can't buy the house. That was the whole point of him backing out of the deal. If he buys the house now, half of it is Carmella's.

It's easy,you do it just like one of
the businesses,put the money up,put
it in another persons' name and move
in,she gets nothing,she can prove nothing
and your done.

Maybe too little too late, but S4 SPOILER ALERT! Consider yourself warned.

I pretty much agree with everything TIS has said up to this point. It's joint property. The law is on Carm's side. Carm has done much to contribute to the Soprano household, such as it is.

And isn't it interesting to explore the psychological (and the show is largely about psychology, after all) ramifications that come with the choices available to Tony?

Tony capitulates, hands over the house to Carm: in this case he's taking the high road. He's putting a higher cause (getting the most stability he can for his kids) before his own needs. If he's even remotely interested in staying with Carm he has to realize that this gesture is going to increase his chances. It's going to bolster his standing with his kids. If nothing else, he realizes that it'll be much easier for him to find a new place to live than it will be for her.

The one thing I didn't like about the whole breakup was Tony going off to sleep in the empty house. Much more plausible, to my way of thinking, that he'd get a room at a hotel. But this is a minor point and I think there was dramatic value in having him crash, unceremoniously, in this place that symbolized all sorts of dreams for a golden future.

Tony being Tony, he also has to factor in how his willingness to leave the house is going to play with his crew. Paulie already gave his two-cents worth. No matter what the law says about sharing of property, these are guys who have spent their whole lives outside of the law. "T, it's your effing money that put her in there!" He's going to be saying, "Yeah, but . . . " so many times he's going to be sick.

An interesting situation.