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Jan 21st, 2020
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"The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140795
12/21/05 08:41 PM
12/21/05 08:41 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 15,058
The Slippery Slope
plawrence Offline OP
RIP StatMan
plawrence  Offline OP
RIP StatMan
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 15,058
The Slippery Slope
here, by popular demand (if you can call one request - by SC - "popular demand") is my Godfather version of the classic "The Night Before Christmas."

Originally written in December, 2002, I offer it once again to dispel the notion that I have no holiday spirit and am, in fact, a grinch in disguise.

The Night Of The Hit Attempt

'Twas the night of the hit attempt, and all through the estate
Some were not sleeping 'cause the party'd run late
The drapes were left open by Fredo with care
Not knowing Roth's hitmen soon would be there

Kay C. was nestled all snug in her bed
While hopes of legitimacy danced in her head
And Mama, still thinking of Connie and Merle
Was hoping her daughter would be a good girl

When out on the lawn there arose a slight clatter
Michael looked through the drapes to see what was the matter
Then away from the window he sprang like a hare
As the sound of the gunfire rang through the air

He crawled on the floor to reach Kay in her bed
And then pulled her down while he cradled her head
The shooting was over and so was the noise
In the room where the children come play with their toys

Michael ran out, though his eyes were still bleary
"Where's Rocco? Where's Fredo? Where's Hagen and Neri?"
"Get them alive, Rocco" is what Michael said
But he knew that the hitmen were already dead

Back in the house Michael sat down with Tom
And said "I'm going away, you will be the new Don
"There's a traitor among us who's name I can't leak"
But he thought it was Fredo, so stupid and weak

On the way to Miami, Michael started to think
About those he had killed without even a blink
McCluskey, Sollozzo, Stracchi and Rizzi
Moe Greene, Tattaglia, Tessio, and Barzini

And he knew he'd be adding one more to that list
And when he found him, his lips he would kiss
The kiss of death he would get, then his life would be lost
But that still left the question: Pentangelli or Roth

By the end of the film, Michael knew who it was
Ola, and Fredo, and Roth was the buzz
So Mike had them all killed, but his mind was still frozen
On Hyman Roth's words about the business he'd chosen

Michael tried to retire, his head started to spin
"As soon as I'm out, they just pull me back in"
He made Vincent the Don, much to his delight
And decided to go to the opera that night

But due to events which unfolded, to wit:
Mike didn't know that there'd be one more hit
Both twins were killed; it was really quite scary
But what made it worse was, the killer got Mary

So Michael died wealthy, though really quite poor
He won many battles, but still lost the war
And now final words for my friends on this site:
Merry Christmas to all...watch The Godfather tonight!


"Difficult....not impossible"
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140796
12/21/05 08:46 PM
12/21/05 08:46 PM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,238
The Ravenite Social Club
Don Cardi Offline
Caporegime
Don Cardi  Offline
Caporegime

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,238
The Ravenite Social Club
BRAVO!!!!!


Don Cardi



Don Cardi cool

Five - ten years from now, they're gonna wish there was American Cosa Nostra. Five - ten years from now, they're gonna miss John Gotti.




Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140797
12/21/05 08:53 PM
12/21/05 08:53 PM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 4,190
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Don Jasani Offline
Underboss
Don Jasani  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 4,190
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Seriously that was very well done! I don't remember reading it the first time but now I know I won't forget it.



Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140798
12/21/05 08:55 PM
12/21/05 08:55 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,675
massachusetts
scarfacetm Offline
Underboss
scarfacetm  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,675
massachusetts
I for one found it really quite good, and it is tempting me to watch one of the Godfather movies tonight.


"Death is the answer to all problems. No man, no problem."

"I'd rather be hated for who i am, than loved for who i am not"
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140799
12/21/05 10:13 PM
12/21/05 10:13 PM
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
The Italian Stallionette Offline
The Italian Stallionette  Offline

Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
I think it's excellent. We should post it every Christmas here on the BB. PLaw, you have a knack!!

Perfect poem for the Holidays on the BB.

TIS


"Mankind must put an end to war before war puts an end to mankind. War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige that the warrior does today." JFK

"War is over, if you want it" - John Lennon

Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140800
12/21/05 10:21 PM
12/21/05 10:21 PM
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453
California
X
XDCX Offline
XDCX  Offline
X

Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453
California
Brilliant, Plaw! Just brilliant!


"Growing up my dad was like 'You have a great last name, Galifianakis. Galifianakis...begins with a gal...and ends with a kiss...' I'm like that's great dad, can we get it changed to 'Galifianafuck' please?" -- Zach Galifianakis



Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140801
12/21/05 10:48 PM
12/21/05 10:48 PM
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 19,066
OH, VA, KY
Mignon Offline
Mama Mig
Mignon  Offline
Mama Mig

Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 19,066
OH, VA, KY
That was great Neal. You are really blessed to have such a wonderful writing talent.


Dylan Matthew Moran born 10/30/12


Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140802
12/22/05 12:30 AM
12/22/05 12:30 AM
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 2,760
Canada
Blake Offline
Underboss
Blake  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 2,760
Canada
Thumbs up mang.


You talkin' to me?
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140803
12/22/05 02:44 AM
12/22/05 02:44 AM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032
Texas
ginaitaliangirl Offline
ginaitaliangirl  Offline

Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032
Texas
Wonderful, Plaw! It should be published. And we'll all be given autographed copies, I assume?

Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140804
12/22/05 05:24 AM
12/22/05 05:24 AM
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 22,902
New York
SC Offline
Consigliere
SC  Offline
Consigliere

Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 22,902
New York
It gets better with age and its becoming an annual tradition for me (kind of like watching "Its a Wonderful Life").

NOW my Christmas is complete!


.
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140805
12/22/05 06:04 AM
12/22/05 06:04 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,735
Lavinia from Italy Offline
Underboss
Lavinia from Italy  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,735
WOW, great job, Plaw!!!! Congrats!


I don't want realism. I want magic! Yes, yes, magic. I try to give that to people. I do misrepresent things. I don't tell the truth. I tell what ought to be truth (Blanche/A streetcar named desire)
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140806
12/22/05 12:21 PM
12/22/05 12:21 PM
Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 12,543
Gateshead, UK
Capo de La Cosa Nostra Offline
Capo de La Cosa Nostra  Offline

Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 12,543
Gateshead, UK
What a delight that was, to read once again
But sadly not a sign of the Lake Tahoe hitmen
If I were there now, from one writer to another
I'd kiss you, though not one of death, and call you my brother

Happy holidays all!


...dot com bold typeface rhetoric.
You go clickety click and get your head split.
'The hell you look like on a message board
Discussing whether or not the Brother is hardcore?
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140807
12/22/05 02:13 PM
12/22/05 02:13 PM
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 3,389
State Asylum
Snake Offline
Underboss
Snake  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 3,389
State Asylum
Far out, plaw! I agree we should post it every Christmas!


"Vaya con Dios, Castle. Go with God."
"God's going to sit this one out." The Punisher (2004)
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140808
12/22/05 02:40 PM
12/22/05 02:40 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 4,206
Los Angeles
Letizia B. Offline
Underboss
Letizia B.  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 4,206
Los Angeles
Always a favorite, PL... I don't think it'll ever get old! Thanks for posting it again!

Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140809
12/22/05 03:06 PM
12/22/05 03:06 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
A Christmas tradition from a man who doesn't celebrate Christmas??? Seriously, Plaw, very well done. I loved it.


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140810
12/22/05 04:42 PM
12/22/05 04:42 PM
Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 67,618
The Villa Quatro
Irishman12 Offline
UNDERBOSS
Irishman12  Offline
UNDERBOSS

Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 67,618
The Villa Quatro
This was my first time reading it and as everyone has said that was AWESOME! Very good job indeed plaw. You are truly blessed and have a wonderful gift of writing/story telling

Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140811
12/23/05 12:37 PM
12/23/05 12:37 PM
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 443
New Jersey
Obsessed With The GodFather Offline
Capo
Obsessed With The GodFather  Offline
Capo
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 443
New Jersey
Cheering Love It!
I am printing this one up!


Johnny Cash & June Carter Cash Fan!
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140812
12/23/05 08:36 PM
12/23/05 08:36 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,211
Little Chicago
Tony Love Offline
Underboss
Tony Love  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,211
Little Chicago
That is an excellent poem! Thank you, Plaw!


"Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so"-Gore Vidal
"Conformity is the jailer of freedom and enemy of growth"-John Fitzgerald Kennedy
"The reason the mainstream is thought of as a stream is because of its shallowness"-George Carlin
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140813
12/24/05 02:44 AM
12/24/05 02:44 AM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,602
Yunkai
afsaneh77 Offline
Mother of Dragons
afsaneh77  Offline
Mother of Dragons

Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,602
Yunkai
Aside from being a piece of propaganda to brainwash members into thinking that it really was Fredo who opened the drapes, yeah, what the heck; it rocked! :p

Couldn't resist messing with you Plaw, especially after all these sweet comments you got there!


"Fire cannot kill a dragon." -Daenerys Targaryen, Game of Thrones
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140814
12/26/05 02:57 PM
12/26/05 02:57 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
Plaw, Just wanted you to know that I read this out loud to Mr. Babe and he called it "outstanding".


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: "The Night Before Christmas" Godfather Version #140815
12/26/05 03:08 PM
12/26/05 03:08 PM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,273
Hell
Mike Sullivan Offline
Underboss
Mike Sullivan  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,273
Hell
This "poem" is one for the ages, plaw. Great stuff, I must say.


Madness! Madness!
- Major Clipton
The Bridge On The River Kwai

GOLD - GOLD - GOLD - GOLD. Bright and Yellow, Hard and Cold, Molten, Graven, Hammered, Rolled, Hard to Get and Light to Hold; Stolen, Borrowed, Squandered - Doled.
- Greed

Nothing Is Written
Lawrence Of Arabia

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