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My brother...
#806475
10/05/14 08:21 PM
10/05/14 08:21 PM
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453 California
XDCX
OP
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OP
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453
California
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I've posted about my brother TJ a handful of times on this board. For those of you who don't know, my brother TJ was born with spinal muscular atrophy, and has been confined to a wheelchair since about the age of two. He has had many health problems throughout his life due to his illness. Due to a lack of muscle mass and being confined to a wheelchair, he's had a lot of trouble with his lungs, often catching pneumonia and bronchitis. He lacked the ability to cough and so was unable to clear his lungs of mucus. Over the years, his health has deteriorated, but you would have never known by his attitude and demeanor. He's always been a fighter and had a wicked sense of humor. TJ sent a text to my other brother, Cliff, earlier today saying that he wasn't feeling good, so he was gonna go to the ER. His mom took him, the doctor diagnosed him with bronchitis, gave him some medicine, and sent him home. About an hour later, TJ told his mom that something wasn't right, he felt like his insides were on fire, and he was having trouble breathing. His mom checked him for a fever, and he was cold to the touch. She rushed him back to the hospital. His lungs were filling with fluid, and his blood pressure was extremely low. The doctors sedated him to try and relieve some of the fluid build up, but he never woke up. My brother died today at the age of 30. I am utterly, totally, completely devastated. I talked to him just a few days ago and he seemed fine. And now he is gone. And I have no idea what to do. I am broken.
"Growing up my dad was like 'You have a great last name, Galifianakis. Galifianakis...begins with a gal...and ends with a kiss...' I'm like that's great dad, can we get it changed to 'Galifianafuck' please?" -- Zach Galifianakis
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Re: My brother...
[Re: XDCX]
#806477
10/05/14 08:37 PM
10/05/14 08:37 PM
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 23,296 Throggs Neck
pizzaboy
The Fuckin Doctor
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The Fuckin Doctor
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 23,296
Throggs Neck
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There are no words, XDCX. I'm so sorry for your loss. This will keep me up tonight. And I know you're not a religious person, we've discussed that in the past. But if it's all the same to you, I'm going to pray for your brother and your family tonight. Stay strong, my friend. That's all you can do at a time like this .
"I got news for you. If it wasn't for the toilet, there would be no books." --- George Costanza.
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Re: My brother...
[Re: XDCX]
#806479
10/05/14 09:30 PM
10/05/14 09:30 PM
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Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 199
Red_63
Made Member
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Made Member
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 199
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XCDX reading your post was very sad I don't know how I would cope with such a devastating matter. I admire your strength for reaching out to the board, it shows a lot of character stay strong...take care
Yeah Your Gangster Alright!! Keep making excuses on why our country is in bad shape just admit your a hump already
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Re: My brother...
[Re: XDCX]
#806489
10/06/14 01:02 AM
10/06/14 01:02 AM
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 31,286 New Jersey, USA
J Geoff
The Don
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The Don
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 31,286
New Jersey, USA
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So saddened to read that... how horrible! I will also say a prayer, cuz it doesn't matter if you're religious or not, if I am. Can't hurt, right? I wish you and your family virtual hugs and strength during this tough time. Just do us and your brother a favor -- when it comes to making tough decisions for the next year, just ask yourself, "what would TJ do?"... and you'll have your answer. Stay strong, but also don't be afraid to be emotional. It's not unmanly to feel.
I studied Italian for 2 semesters. Not once was a "C" pronounced as a "G", and never was a trailing "I" ignored! And I'm from Jersey! lol Whaddaya want me to do? Whack a guy? Off a guy? Whack off a guy? --Peter Griffin My DVDs | Facebook | Godfather Filming Locations
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Re: My brother...
[Re: XDCX]
#806609
10/06/14 02:07 PM
10/06/14 02:07 PM
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Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,021 far, northwest
Binnie_Coll
Underboss
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Underboss
Joined: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,021
far, northwest
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xdcs, im new to this site, only been on a little over a month, I know where youre coming from. my brother died in 2008, I looked after him for years, was a diabetic for 50 years, even when youre prepared for it it hurts bad, what got me through it was my strong believe in the after life. there is no death only a change of worlds. we are just passing through this life, the real one is to come. you will see him again.
" watch what you say around this guy, he's got a big mouth" sam giancana to an outfit soldier about frank Sinatra. [ from the book "my way"
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Re: My brother...
[Re: Turnbull]
#806752
10/07/14 01:37 AM
10/07/14 01:37 AM
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453 California
XDCX
OP
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OP
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453
California
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I truly do appreciate all the kind words and well wishes. Words may seem shallow to the person speaking them, but they are of invaluable help to the person in pain.
TJ was a great guy. The memories I cherish the most are of us as kids. It seemed as though our sole purpose in life was to irritate TJ's father (we were technically stepbrothers). ANYTHING we could think of to irritate my stepdad, we would do it. Hide his keys, respond to ANYTHING he said with "mmmmkayyyy?", whether or not he asked a question. We were constantly getting grounded.
I remember one time when my stepdad took us all out for a ride, and we passed by a field of cows. We convinced my little sister, Amber, that the cows were horses and that horses were cows. No matter what anybody else would tell her, we reinforced that those were horses, not cows. Amber brought a book of farm animals home and tried to show us we were wrong, but we ended up convincing her that the book was wrong! This went on for months, and it actually caused some issues with her teacher at school. In hindsight, it was a horrible thing to do, but we were kids!
We would go on long walks and talk for hours. He was my best friend. We were unable to spend a lot of time together since my move to California, but we kept in touch by phone and social media. The last time I actually saw him was four years ago. That kills me.
I'll be headed back to Maryland on Friday for the funeral. I'm not looking forward to it, but he deserves a proper send off. He'll get it.
Again, thanks so much for the support and kind words. It really does help.
"Growing up my dad was like 'You have a great last name, Galifianakis. Galifianakis...begins with a gal...and ends with a kiss...' I'm like that's great dad, can we get it changed to 'Galifianafuck' please?" -- Zach Galifianakis
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Re: My brother...
[Re: Sicilian Babe]
#806971
10/08/14 07:38 AM
10/08/14 07:38 AM
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984 California
The Italian Stallionette
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
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X, FWIW, when my father passed away (4 yrs ago next month), I saw this quote. I don't remember if it was on a sympathy card or a mass card or what, but it summed it up. I still have it on my e-mail signature. It's so true!! " Death leaves a heartache that no one can heal. Love leaves a memory that no one can steal." TIS
"Mankind must put an end to war before war puts an end to mankind. War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige that the warrior does today." JFK
"War is over, if you want it" - John Lennon
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Re: My brother...
[Re: The Italian Stallionette]
#807042
10/08/14 01:01 PM
10/08/14 01:01 PM
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453 California
XDCX
OP
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OP
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453
California
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"Death leaves a heartache that no one can heal. Love leaves a memory that no one can steal."
TIS That is about as true a statement as I have ever read. Thanks for sharing that, TIS. And again, thank you so much for all the kindness and well wishes. My family and I have truly been humbled by the outpouring of love and support from our friends and loved ones. We've set up a fund that people can donate to, to help cover the funeral cost. One thing about losing a loved one is it isn't cheap burying them. There is no obligation to contribute, but I'd never forgive myself if I didn't do all I could to give my brother the send off he deserves. So I'll post the link. Funeral Fund for TJ
"Growing up my dad was like 'You have a great last name, Galifianakis. Galifianakis...begins with a gal...and ends with a kiss...' I'm like that's great dad, can we get it changed to 'Galifianafuck' please?" -- Zach Galifianakis
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Re: My brother...
[Re: XDCX]
#807181
10/09/14 12:29 AM
10/09/14 12:29 AM
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 31,286 New Jersey, USA
J Geoff
The Don
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The Don
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 31,286
New Jersey, USA
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I sent a little, and don't be embarrassed about asking! ... good luck!
I studied Italian for 2 semesters. Not once was a "C" pronounced as a "G", and never was a trailing "I" ignored! And I'm from Jersey! lol Whaddaya want me to do? Whack a guy? Off a guy? Whack off a guy? --Peter Griffin My DVDs | Facebook | Godfather Filming Locations
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Re: My brother...
[Re: Sicilian Babe]
#807908
10/11/14 04:47 PM
10/11/14 04:47 PM
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453 California
XDCX
OP
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OP
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,453
California
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The funeral was today. I had no idea something could be so beautiful, yet so awful. Joyful, yet dreadful. Laughing one minute, crying the next. I know it's selfish to want him back, but I'd give anything for just one more moment. I love you TJ, and I'm sure as hell gonna miss you. Rest in peace, buddy. You've earned it.
"Growing up my dad was like 'You have a great last name, Galifianakis. Galifianakis...begins with a gal...and ends with a kiss...' I'm like that's great dad, can we get it changed to 'Galifianafuck' please?" -- Zach Galifianakis
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