A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at
The Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks." "Everyone on Earth has a
Lie-Clock every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's." The hands had never moved, indicating that
she never told a lie.

"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"
St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock." The hands had
moved twice. Telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life.

"Where's Senator John Kerry's clock?" asked the man.

"Senator's Kerry's clock is in Jesus' office." St. Peter responded!

"Senator Kerry's clock is so important it is in Jesus' office?"
Asked the man.

"Yes, he's using it as a ceiling fan." Responded St. Peter.


If winners never lose, well, then a loser sure can sing the blues.