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Toodoped: I said I creep and I crawl and I creep and I crawl And I creep and I crawl creep creep lol
Toodoped: Lots of "amnesia"...some people are posting the same stuff over and over, and every time they are happy like small kids lol
Toodoped: a small reminder...screw all paywalls!
Toodoped: Anyone heard from @BigTuna? He is absent for quite some time...I hope is ok
Toodoped: Any idiot can face a crisis - it's day to day living that wears you out.
Toodoped: Thanks buddy! We should continue fighting against these lying paying sites and to protect everyone on this forum, especially the younger generation or posters.
Toodoped: these days lots of people that I know lost their families and everything they had because its legit and even youngsters can chip in
Toodoped: Same as the mob paying sites...ppl pay for "Disneyland" and wiki mob stuff, something which they can find it on their own with a simple google search
VanillaLimeCoke: Lousy school violence these days. Not even a 6th of the way through September and we've already had a psychotic violent school shooting.
Toodoped: Word. Few days ago, over here, they caught one teenager with a gun and more than 60 bullets, while going to school. I wonder what was his plan ?!
Toodoped: Damn....the retard slowly became a stalker and he's following me whenever I make a post so he can bump up his own $0,5 "projects" lol lol "IT" is finished and I love it lol
Toodoped: still talking to yourself, a stupido?! lol lol
Toodoped: hahahahahaha I can do it all day long
Toodoped: Cant believe this shit...im off to find some real pussy
Toodoped: aaaaand....the retarded stalker is back again
Toodoped: For those who enjoyed the "TD's Free Outfit Articles 2023/24" thread, well thanks to @TB for making it a sticky on the first page in the OC forum so everyone can enjoy it. Again, I want to personally say thanks to TB, JGeoff and the whole GBB forum. Salut
VanillaLimeCoke: I can’t take it anymore. Everything has gotta change. Or at least a lot.
Toodoped: Screw the world bro...the main thing today is to take care of you and yours.
VanillaLimeCoke: I’m hoping and praying that 2025 will be so much better. …. for real …. Too
Giacomo_Vacari: Damn, he is posting the same things over and over, nothing new. Watch out the flu is bad this year. January 20th Trump gets sworn in, and hopefully turn things around.
VanillaLimeCoke: Yeah, but they’re already planning things so he can’t turn them around
VanillaLimeCoke: Biden’s pardened over 8000 people, most of which were issued in the last 2-3 months
hoodlum: Yes, most likely 2 piss off that crybaby & compulsive liar now sadly in office.
Jason1969: Hey! After applying months ago, I finally got my button and was accepted as a member!
NYMafia: Just when I thought I was out…they pull me back in!
hoodlum: My 15 yr. old grandson who thinks his generation invented all got into a small debate.....I asked him 2 explain the old (Archie Bunkeresque) tale..."You don't buy beer,,,,You rent it..Needless 2 say , he was dumfounded ....stupid little fuck...
NYMafia: Hey! Paisan. Thatsa Somma Spicy Meeta Balla U Gotta Da, Kid!
NYMafia: ...Take Alka-Seltzer for fast relief
NYMafia: It’s all about the rhythm, gotta have rhythm.
VanillaLimeCoke: Let us take a moment to remember the fallen ones for this Memorial Day Weekend
NYMafia: It you’re playing a game of poker and you look around the table and can’t tell who the sucker is...it’s you.
NYMafia: Thank you, VanillaLimeCoke.
NYMafia: "There's a sucker born every minute..and two to take him. ~ P.T. Barnum
NYMafia: Are you suffering from diarrhea? Are you shitting your pants again? Then take Imodium for fast relief....This has been a public service message.
NYMafia: Always! Not sure some others can say the same. Thats why I mentioned the Imodium. LOL.
NYMafia: Heartburn and indigestion acting up again? Take Pepto-Bismol for fast relief….This has been another public service message.
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Forums21
Topics43,540
Posts1,094,024
Members10,381
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Most Online1,254
Mar 13th, 2025
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Re: Lets Get Some Jokes!
[Re: Obsessed With The GodFather]
#648365
05/23/12 09:07 AM
05/23/12 09:07 AM
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,432
Bar Vitelli, Queens, NY
Signor Vitelli
Underboss
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Underboss
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,432
Bar Vitelli, Queens, NY
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Confucius says: Man who fart in church must sit in his own pew.
"For me, there's only my wife..."
"Sure I cook with wine - sometimes I even add it to the food!"
"When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies?"
"It was a grass harp... And we listened."
"Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it? Every, every minute?"
"No. Saints and poets, maybe... they do some."
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Re: Lets Get Some Jokes!
[Re: MaryCas]
#649103
05/29/12 03:50 PM
05/29/12 03:50 PM
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,455
California
XDCX
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,455
California
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I think I may have posted this a few years ago, but I still get a kick out of it!
If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their famous sketch, "Who's on First?" may have sounded something like this:
Costello calls a computer store to ask about a computer. Abbot answers the phone.
Abbott: Super Duper Computer Store. Can I help you?
Costello: Yes. I'm setting up an office at home and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
Abbott: Mac?
Costello: No, my name's Lou.
Abbott: Your computer?
Costello: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
Abbott: Mac?
Costello: I told you, my name's Lou.
Abbott: OK then, what about Windows?
Costello: Why? Will it get stuffy in there?
Abbott: No. But do you want a computer with Windows?
Costello: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
Abbott: Wallpaper at first.
Costello: Never mind the windows! I need a computer and some software.
Abbott: Software for Windows?
Abbott and Costello Computer Skit Costello: No! On the computer! I need something I can use to run my business, write proposals and track expenses. What do you have?
Abbott: Office.
Costello: Yeah, for my office. I told you that. Can you recommend anything?
Abbott: I just did.
Costello: You just did what?
Abbott: Recommended something.
Costello: You recommended something?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: For my office?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: OK. What did you recommend for my office?
Abbott: Office.
Costello: Yes, for my office!
Abbott: I recommend Office with Windows.
Costello: My office already has windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to write a proposal. What would I need?
Abbott: Word.
Costello: What word?
Abbott: Word in Office.
Costello: The only word in office is office.
Abbott: You need the Word in Office for Windows.
Costello: Which word in office for windows?
Abbott: The Word you get when you click the blue "W."
Costello: I'm going to click your blue "W" if you don't give me some straight answers. What about bookkeeping? Do you have anything I can use to track my money?
Abbott: Sure, Money.
Costello: That's right. What do you have?
Abbott: Money.
Costello: I need money to track my money?
Abbott: Yes, and It comes bundled with your computer.
Costello: What comes bundled with my computer?
Abbott: Money.
Costello: Money comes with my computer?
Abbott: Yes. No extra charge.
Costello: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much do I get?
Abbott: One copy.
Costello: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
Abbott: We got a license from Microsoft to copy Money.
Costello: They can give you a license to copy money?
Abbott: Why not? They own it!
(A few days later)
Abbott: Super Duper Computer Store. Can I help you?
Costello: How do I turn my computer off?
Abbott: Click "START."
"Growing up my dad was like 'You have a great last name, Galifianakis. Galifianakis...begins with a gal...and ends with a kiss...' I'm like that's great dad, can we get it changed to 'Galifianafuck' please?" -- Zach Galifianakis
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Re: Lets Get Some Jokes!
[Re: klydon1]
#653729
06/29/12 04:42 PM
06/29/12 04:42 PM
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,455
California
XDCX
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 5,455
California
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Once you figure out what has 4 letters, but occasionally has 12, you're there.  Well I, for one, have figured out what has 4 letters, and occasionally has 12, but also intermittently has 14.
"Growing up my dad was like 'You have a great last name, Galifianakis. Galifianakis...begins with a gal...and ends with a kiss...' I'm like that's great dad, can we get it changed to 'Galifianafuck' please?" -- Zach Galifianakis
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Re: Lets Get Some Jokes!
[Re: Obsessed With The GodFather]
#654951
07/10/12 05:50 AM
07/10/12 05:50 AM
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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 5,325
MI
Lilo
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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 5,325
MI
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A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day.
"In English", he said "a double negative forms a positive. In some languages, such a Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However there is no language in which a double positive can form a negative."
A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right".
"When the snows fall and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives."
Winter is Coming
Now this is the Law of the Jungle—as old and as true as the sky; And the wolf that shall keep it may prosper, but the wolf that shall break it must die.
As the creeper that girdles the tree-trunk, the Law runneth forward and back; For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.
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Re: Lets Get Some Jokes!
[Re: Lilo]
#655039
07/10/12 09:17 PM
07/10/12 09:17 PM
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,432
Bar Vitelli, Queens, NY
Signor Vitelli
Underboss
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Underboss
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,432
Bar Vitelli, Queens, NY
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"For me, there's only my wife..."
"Sure I cook with wine - sometimes I even add it to the food!"
"When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies?"
"It was a grass harp... And we listened."
"Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it? Every, every minute?"
"No. Saints and poets, maybe... they do some."
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Re: Lets Get Some Jokes!
[Re: XDCX]
#655493
07/14/12 09:49 PM
07/14/12 09:49 PM
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
The Italian Stallionette
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
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Ha ha ha ha ha!! LMAO  That is hilarious!!  Tho I haven't been there in years, Venice Beach can be a source of people watching entertainment too. I was on Hollywood Blvd. a couple days ago with some visiting relatives. We had to park in a lot down a side street. As we got out of our car, Zorro (cape, mask and all) was walking down the street, saying hello as he passed by us. I think (or guessed) he may have been part of the many characters hired to walk down the Blvd. and have pictures taken with tourists. Then again, you never know. There really are all kinds of characters there. TIS
"Mankind must put an end to war before war puts an end to mankind. War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige that the warrior does today." JFK
"War is over, if you want it" - John Lennon
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Re: Lets Get Some Jokes!
[Re: Yogi Barrabbas]
#660886
08/19/12 10:16 AM
08/19/12 10:16 AM
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
The Italian Stallionette
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
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An English farmer has successfully grown a field full of vibrators!!
However he now has a problem with squatters!! Ha ha ha ha TIS
"Mankind must put an end to war before war puts an end to mankind. War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige that the warrior does today." JFK
"War is over, if you want it" - John Lennon
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Re: Lets Get Some Jokes!
[Re: Yogi Barrabbas]
#660892
08/19/12 11:37 AM
08/19/12 11:37 AM
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 22,902
New York
SC
Consigliere
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Consigliere
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 22,902
New York
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An English farmer has successfully grown a field full of vibrators!!
However he now has a problem with squatters!! Sounds like the basis for a movie about nymphomaniacs on a banana ranch.
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