Well, I have to comment on this: I sat, eyes glued to the screen, for two hours last night and marveled in awe at the strange world of Michael Jackson. A few observations:

First off, what is up with those freaky ass mannequins he brings with him? Those things would scare the fucking hell out of me if I were left in a room alone with them! I'd have to keep checking them to make sure they weren't getting up and coming alive!

Secondly, let's talk about the face. He said he had one surgery to clear up a breathing problem...I guess you wouldn't have a breathing problem anymore if the surgeons completely removed your nose! Also, the guy looks like a clown. I mean, short of a fat red nose, he has the powder white skin, the comically raised cheekbones, the super-red lips...the guy should get a side job working for the Ringling Brothers!!!

Also, his fascination with children is just weird. Towards the end of the show, he said he wanted to adopt two children, a boy and a girl, from each country in the world...HAHA!!! That is so ridiculous it is hysterically funny! I don't know how in the world the interviewer held a straight face the whole time! I saw him almost lose it once, but then he caught himself...

Why are his children totally white? His newest kid, "Blanket", the one he made cry when he was feeding it and dangled over a balcony, was totally white, you could see it through the goddamn shawl the kid had on! Amazingly enough, Jackson says that he changed, which in his eyes apparantly means that his whole face morphed, his skin tone completely changed, and his voice got higher, not lower.

Michael Jackson also has a sort of god complex. I mean, he has a "magic tree" in his backyard, where he sits on it and writes songs and poems...the guy honestly believes he has the cure for cancer through love, as was demonstrated with that kid who seems to be so endeared to Jackson...he also said in a part that wasn't televised that his urine is actually liquid gold and that his bowel movements contain the sweetest strawberries ever grown!

I would have loved to hear Michael answer every single question anyone could ever think of, as you know each answer is going to be better than the last! He needs to have a fucking reality show, NOW!