I have a Capital One card which I very very seldom use (mostly when I travel, but not even so much then).
Anyway, I got this letter yesterday that cracks me up:
You never write. You never call. You never charge.
What did we do? Or (gulp) not do?
No holding back. This relationship is not working. But it's not you, it's us. So let's talk." Then it goes on to ask me to call for a card "upgrade".
I thought it was funny.
TIS