I feel quite awful for Robert Patrick. He's really a surprisingly good actor, but unless James Mangold is casting him, Patrick is stuck working garbage that is below his talent. Then I see THE MARINE, and I want to drink. The poor guy is relegated to jobbing TERMINATOR jokes.
There is so much to hate about regarding THE MARINE, and none of it was pleasant to write about.
Let's start with the opening, where you have wrassler John Cena go all action hero on some Iraqis with explosions, bullets, you name it. He's then discharged by his Marine superiors because of some rather incredible contrived nonsense of how he disobeyed direct orders while saving some fellow soldiers. Wouldn't said person in reality be given a medal and used for propaganda?
Anyway, he is now a security guard and the scene at his new job is a prime reason why THE MARINE isn't just a bad movie, its a bad action movie. Its a set-up for what should be a good laugh, and a tease of aciton, when Cena has to "escort" an asshole executive out of the building. Instead, its neither humorous nor exciting as it ought to be.
Maybe the problem is in Cena. He just isn't an automatic credible action figure and lacks instant quiet charisma to for the part that's scripted for him like say Jason Statham.
Thing is, he seems to have a naturally sympathetic face, almost like if Dolph Lundgren had a soul. If the movie was built around his strengths, perhaps he would have triumphed in the midst of this crap. Unfortunately, much like his WWE work, the producers want him to be somebody that he isn't.
But THE MARINE isn't completely his fault. While most action movies have alot of ridiculous moments that defy reality, but when its the entire movie, I'm actually impressed in a morbid sort of way.
THE MARINE is shot by a director who's seen way too many idiotic Bruckheimer movies and the plot is incredibly bland. Patrick has nothing to work with as yet another bastard Hans Gruber clone, except without the smarts, wit, or entertainment. Too many bad jokes and worse, several of them are repeated this side of a failed drug test from Chris Masters.
Worse, there is this sub-plot pushed about how a black henchman was molested as a kid, and he then proceeds to lay so many idiotic complaints, I was tempted to call this movie racist.
Its obvious that THE MARINE was targeted for rednecks, who make up a good number of the WWE fanbase. As a redneck, I found the picture to be unfunny, tasteless, very lame, and pretty unsatisfying.
You know, just like WWE programming in the last few years.
