I don't know which is worse to me, if a scene is violent or if it is "disturbing".

I think the most violent scene I have seen in a movie wasn't even in a mob movie, it was in one they show occasionally on "Lifetime" called "The Tracey Thurman Story", a true story about a wife who is beaten for years by her husband while the town's law enforcement does nothing because they are married. The scene where he beats her for the last time and leaves her paralyzed is the most disturbing I've ever seen, it seems to go on forever.