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2006 Redneck rules #153336
03/31/06 10:46 AM
03/31/06 10:46 AM
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 750
Tennessee
AngelaMarie Offline OP
Underboss
AngelaMarie  Offline OP
Underboss
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 750
Tennessee
This is especially for Partagas and others who like Redneck stuff. I thought of you all at the GangsterBB when I got this in the email....


Here is the 2006 version of..."You know your a redneck when....." Yep, the new one is out!

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.


3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.


4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.


5. You think the "nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.


6. The salvation army declines your furniture.


7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.


8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.


9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.


10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.


11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.


12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.


13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.


14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.


15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.


16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.


17. You have a rag for a gas cap.


18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.


19. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.


20. You can spit without opening your mouth.


21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.


22. Your life time goal is to own a fireworks stand.


23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "cool whip" on the side.


24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.


25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.


26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.


27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does a $100,000 worth of improvements.


28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.


29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.


30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.

Re: 2006 Redneck rules #153337
03/31/06 10:55 AM
03/31/06 10:55 AM
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
The Italian Stallionette Offline
The Italian Stallionette  Offline

Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 25,984
California
Ha ha ha!!!!


1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

Hilarious!!

TIS


"Mankind must put an end to war before war puts an end to mankind. War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige that the warrior does today." JFK

"War is over, if you want it" - John Lennon

Re: 2006 Redneck rules #153338
03/31/06 11:15 AM
03/31/06 11:15 AM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,238
The Ravenite Social Club
Don Cardi Offline
Caporegime
Don Cardi  Offline
Caporegime

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,238
The Ravenite Social Club
You know you're a redneck when :

Somebody yells "HoeDown" and your girlfriend hits the ground!


Don Cardi



Don Cardi cool

Five - ten years from now, they're gonna wish there was American Cosa Nostra. Five - ten years from now, they're gonna miss John Gotti.




Re: 2006 Redneck rules #153339
03/31/06 03:31 PM
03/31/06 03:31 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
Those are hilarious!! The saddest thing is that last year I tried to donate my old couch to the Salvation Army and they rejected it!!


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: 2006 Redneck rules #153340
03/31/06 06:46 PM
03/31/06 06:46 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
Enzo Scifo Offline
Underboss
Enzo Scifo  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
These are really good.


Quote
See, we can act as smart as we want, but at the end of the day, we still follow a guy who fucks himself with kebab skewers.

Moderated by  Don Cardi, J Geoff, SC, Turnbull 

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