tied with the one about the dog and his balls. well, this thread is the funniest ever! [/b][/quote]Hey. Beats Shakespeare v.s Tupac

Is it wrong that I have a huge picture of JGeoff from the pics thread that I had enlarged placed on the ceiling above my bed, and that I lovingly touch myself to sleep every night while dreaming of marrying into the moderator family with every loving nuzzle of my left hand?

Umm...never mind. :p

You really know how to make me laugh Part

You think it's funny, but I've (unfortunatly) seen this! In high school I was on the school bus with the track team. We were driving through Philly and we look over to see some guy doing his "stuff" in the middle of the expressway. The funny part was when he heard 25 girls yell "EEEEWWWWWWW!!!!"

Part -

I hope to get to meet you at the Chicago convention. You'll excuse me if I don't shake your hand, though.

Oh my gosh! ha ha

I don't see why people think it is so gross. Most people do do it. It is pretty much just normal.

It's strange, becuase for a long time I was actually thinking of starting a thread like this here for support on the whole situation, more for actual seriousness than just comedy.

That being said, there are currentely two members in the poll who have answered that they have never masturbated. I'm going to go 'head a step up to the plate and admit that I was the second person and I can assure you I am not lying.

So goes the story of my odyssey through this issue. Sure enought, some four years ago or so, I would never indulge in such an activity. As time went on nearly all my friends greatly encouraged me to start "jerking it" (along with many other terms) and as time went on and sexual deprivation remained, so did my desire to do it. As my friends radically encouraged me to do it I would reply that I would not feel moraly right doing it. Some even went ahead and admitted "yeah, it's a sin, but you should do it a little." Actually, as far as I'm concerned it's not a sin, at least by basic description of The Bible. It is not in The Ten Commandments and The Story of Onan proved to be invalid to go against the practice. More recentely I had read in MANY books around that masturbation is quite normal and healthy. In parenting books I read that parents should make sure that their kids know that masturbation is a safe, healthy practice. The more I read, the more I wanted to consider doing it (I'll have you know that this would be very late for my age). I also looked all over the internet (including this board, believe it or not) for discussion on the topic and like the books, most not only accepted, but encouraged the practice. However, the very small percentage that was against masturbation really shook me. Had schools been more elequint on the issue, perhaps I may not have suffered nearly as much, but our friends in government apparentely kept that kind of thing from happening. I'm a Methodist, I don't consider myself real deep in as I rarely attend services these days and the discussions simply never came up. Let me tell you, and I think this is a good way to express to you all that I'm telling the truth, when my friends would encourage to me to beat it, I wanted them too. I really, really wanted them to keep on nagging on the off chance that they might actually talk me into it and that I might achieve that since of freedom. I guess, I still do welcome all who would continue to try to motivate me, but alas, the whole thing has been rather confusing and painful. So it is, that I remain away from the practice with no feelings of contempt towards others doing it or feelings that the practice is wrong. If I were a father, and the subject came up, I'd probably say go 'head and do it. When I knew that, I thought maybe I had entered into some stage of what I would call reverse-hypocrisy, where instead of telling others not to do something while doing yourself, you allow others to things that you wouldn't do. However, sex is just not really my first priority right now. It's almost like I've given up something that I never had.

Anyway, if there's some you might get from this (what could very well be considered sad) story, it's that society had turned its back on the issue entirely. The old horrors that were believed to have come from masturbation have been disproven, but it appears as though it remains annoyingly controversial as to even be discusses amongst the youth. All of you who enjoy the practice, that's all great for you, I bet it's a great tension reliever, but for me, after all I've been through with this topic, I guess I've just lost the will. While this topic may be a comical thread, I think it is also a serious one and I'm glad that it's been brought up.

My hat off to you. It took some balls posting that. Here's a personal question though: I really don't think there's any way to avoid masturbating though. Didn't you ever have a "wet dream?" -Pat

Well the only negative thing is, when u get laid for the first time ur partner wont be happy and yes it is true that if u whack off all the time, ur sensitivity goes down alittle so u can go longer

Exactly what I was thinking while I was reading that.

So you really have never experienced orgasm? How old are you, by the way?

Didn't you ever have a "wet dream?"

Yes, they sure cuased quite a nuseance, too. You end up going to sleep in a pair of your good pants, have some pathetic undesired fantasy, and the next morning you got cleaning up to do. Although after depriving myself of the coveted activity, I got to the point where I actually started wanting them to occur. I pretty sure those days are behind me now, though. It's sort of like I've adopted that kind of Michael Corleone status after Apolonia was killed. Sex just doesn't seem to be a thing for me really.

I am, in fact, 18. Before I turned that age, I thought to myself that by the time I reached that age, I would stop looking around for "masturbation approval" if you well, and just give the idea up. However, even after turning 18, I have still ended up looking through phycological and religious books, researching for reasons I can't really even figure out anymore. So, yeah, the only thing near an orgasm I've had would be those awkward dreams. I figure as pathetic as my sexual deprivation may be, it might help in me becoming more sucessful as a screenwriter somehow...

not whackin off will make you a succesfull screenplay writer??

Oh yeah. That'll be a great movie. "The Wet Nightmare". Part Hitchcock, part Bob Chinn.

Just a theory about less concentration on sex and more concentration on art or something to that effect.