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May 27th, 2012
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Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30370
07/17/05 11:25 AM
07/17/05 11:25 AM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
OMG - JG - You called yourself a queen!! lol

I understand what you're saying. Since I have a teenage daughter, I'm used to doing serious proofreading, especially for run on sentences, which my daughter is quite fond of. I feel that a writer strikes on a style first, and grammar second. I think it's more important for PL to find his voice, which he is successfully doing, and then proofread later.


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30371
07/17/05 12:57 PM
07/17/05 12:57 PM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,224
The Ravenite Social Club
Don Cardi Offline
Caporegime
Don Cardi  Offline
Caporegime

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Posts: 18,224
The Ravenite Social Club
Some of the greatest authors and writers are not so good with grammer, etc. This is why there are proofreaders and editors in the writing industry.

What's with all the grammer correcting and english lessons on here lately? I feel like I'm back in school again! eek lol

Keep on writing Plaw! Screw the grammer. The story is what really counts. wink

Imagine, our Don Malta, Da guy who talks lye dis mang! Da guy who amire Tony Montana all tru da coolege mang. Now giving lesson's on sentence structure and proper grammer. lol wink

ThEir and DefinItely! grin



Don Cardi cool



Don Cardi cool

Five - ten years from now, they're gonna wish there was American Cosa Nostra. Five - ten years from now, they're gonna miss John Gotti.




Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30372
07/17/05 01:08 PM
07/17/05 01:08 PM
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 30,834
New Jersey, USA
J Geoff Offline
The Don
J Geoff  Offline
The Don

Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 30,834
New Jersey, USA
Quote
Originally posted by Sicilian Babe:
OMG - JG - You called yourself a queen!! lol
The risk I took to not call you a king! grin wink

Quote
Originally posted by Don Cardi:
Screw the grammer.
Screw the spelling, too? lol
CoughgrammarCough tongue wink

Just messin' wink grin



I studied Italian for 2 semesters. Not once was a "C" pronounced as a "G", and never was a trailing "I" ignored! And I'm from Jersey! tongue lol

Whaddaya want me to do? Whack a guy? Off a guy? Whack off a guy? --Peter Griffin

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Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30373
07/17/05 01:13 PM
07/17/05 01:13 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
JG - Actually, I prefer Goddess. wink


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30374
08/09/05 07:29 AM
08/09/05 07:29 AM
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 458
Dublin, Ireland
Vito's Legacy Offline
'Family' Man
Vito's Legacy  Offline
'Family' Man
Capo
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 458
Dublin, Ireland
Any chance of an update? This is great!


"Mr. Corleone is a man who insists on hearing bad news immediately..." wink
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30375
08/09/05 07:33 AM
08/09/05 07:33 AM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 15,058
The Slippery Slope
plawrence Offline OP
RIP StatMan
plawrence  Offline OP
RIP StatMan
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 15,058
The Slippery Slope
I dunno...... ohwell

I got myself in trouble by trying to tie up too many loose ends and introduce characters from GF III, with no clear idea about where I was going with them, plot-wise.

I really have only one plot idea for the rest of the story which, in my mind, is not that interesting, and no way to tie all the characters into it.

But thanks for the compliment, and I'm glad you enjoyed it as far as it went.


"Difficult....not impossible"
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30376
08/09/05 07:39 AM
08/09/05 07:39 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,735
Lavinia from Italy Offline
Underboss
Lavinia from Italy  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,735
Quote
Originally posted by plawrence:
But thanks for the compliment, and I'm glad you enjoyed it as far as it went.
I confess I am not a regular reader, Plaw..... blush but the sex scenes related posts got me rolling on the floor laughing!!! lol lol


I don't want realism. I want magic! Yes, yes, magic. I try to give that to people. I do misrepresent things. I don't tell the truth. I tell what ought to be truth (Blanche/A streetcar named desire)
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30377
08/09/05 10:00 AM
08/09/05 10:00 AM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
frown frown Plaw, I know it was you that decided to stop writing. You broke my heart.


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30378
08/16/05 10:57 AM
08/16/05 10:57 AM
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 330
Warsaw
Joe Batters Offline
Capo
Joe Batters  Offline
Capo
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 330
Warsaw
To just come up with that on a wim, in my opinion is incredible.. PL you have all my respect for even trying and doing such a good job....I've tried to write short stories and I can't get past the first paragraph..it is a very hard thing to do to write something interesting, and I think you succeded in doing just that with even this ruff copy.........I don't know about everyone else, especially Dr. WFL, but I think you did an excellent job and I would have no problem buying the book if you ever finish it....
Keep it up smile cool cool cool


Aspanu summon the all of the chiefs
DEATH TO ALL WHO BETRAY GIULIANO!
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30379
08/23/05 11:52 AM
08/23/05 11:52 AM
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 19,054
OH, VA, KY
Mignon Offline
Mama Mig
Mignon  Offline
Mama Mig

Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 19,054
OH, VA, KY
Plaw,

PLEASE KEEP WORKING ON THIS BOOK!!!!!


Dylan Matthew Moran born 10/30/12


Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30380
08/23/05 04:26 PM
08/23/05 04:26 PM
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 607
Peter_Clemenza Offline
Underboss
Peter_Clemenza  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 607
I agree with Mignon. Your writings are very interesting to read, plawrence.

Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30381
08/23/05 07:22 PM
08/23/05 07:22 PM
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 111
Michele Corleone Offline
Made Member
Michele Corleone  Offline
Made Member
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 111
I agree - I have missed plaw's postings. And you grammar tutors out there, please cut him some slack!


Christopher: Louis Brasi sleeps with the fishes.
Sal: LUCA Brasi, Luca.
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30382
08/24/05 08:04 PM
08/24/05 08:04 PM
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 11
A
Ameer Offline
Wiseguy
Ameer  Offline
A
Wiseguy
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 11
I ab-so-lute-ly love it. I love reading it, and hope to see more in the future; maybe you could put together the "unofficial Godfather 2.5" and get your name plastered all over the press as the one who compensated for GFR.

Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30383
09/02/05 12:16 PM
09/02/05 12:16 PM
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,733
JustMe Offline
Underboss
JustMe  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,733
Come on, Plaw! Stop reading Dreiser and write something more!


keep your mouth shut, and your eyes open.
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30384
09/02/05 12:39 PM
09/02/05 12:39 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 15,058
The Slippery Slope
plawrence Offline OP
RIP StatMan
plawrence  Offline OP
RIP StatMan
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 15,058
The Slippery Slope
eek eek eek eek

How did you know?

I swear, right now I'm just finishing re-reading An American Tragedy for about the fourth time.

Are you a Dreiser fan?


"Difficult....not impossible"
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30385
09/02/05 12:57 PM
09/02/05 12:57 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
Enzo Scifo Offline
Underboss
Enzo Scifo  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
Are you ever gonna work on it again?

Maybe you should tell that one future you have, and ask other boardmembers for help, plotwise. I'm sure interesting ideas can be found that way.


Quote
See, we can act as smart as we want, but at the end of the day, we still follow a guy who fucks himself with kebab skewers.
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30386
09/02/05 07:27 PM
09/02/05 07:27 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
Every time I see this thread resurrected, I eagerly open it in hopes that Plaw has started writing his sequel again, but, once again, my heart is broken. frown


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30387
09/02/05 07:34 PM
09/02/05 07:34 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
Enzo Scifo Offline
Underboss
Enzo Scifo  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
Djeesh frown
I'm sorry I opened this thread again wink
I didn't wanna hurt your feelings.
grin


Quote
See, we can act as smart as we want, but at the end of the day, we still follow a guy who fucks himself with kebab skewers.
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30388
09/02/05 07:44 PM
09/02/05 07:44 PM
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
Sicilian Babe Offline
Sicilian Babe  Offline

Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,274
New York
I forgive you, Enzo. It's Plaw that I can't forgive! lol


President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30389
09/02/05 07:45 PM
09/02/05 07:45 PM
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 19,054
OH, VA, KY
Mignon Offline
Mama Mig
Mignon  Offline
Mama Mig

Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 19,054
OH, VA, KY
Aww man I was hoping for another chapter. Come on Plaw. We want more. wink


Dylan Matthew Moran born 10/30/12


Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30390
08/03/06 07:28 PM
08/03/06 07:28 PM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,224
The Ravenite Social Club
Don Cardi Offline
Caporegime
Don Cardi  Offline
Caporegime

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,224
The Ravenite Social Club
Ok Mr. Plaw, I think that it's time to revive this topic so that you can pick up where you left off in writing your GF sequel.

Now get to work. wink


Don Cardi cool



Don Cardi cool

Five - ten years from now, they're gonna wish there was American Cosa Nostra. Five - ten years from now, they're gonna miss John Gotti.




Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30391
08/03/06 08:09 PM
08/03/06 08:09 PM
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 19,054
OH, VA, KY
Mignon Offline
Mama Mig
Mignon  Offline
Mama Mig

Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 19,054
OH, VA, KY
Yea Plaw, you promised your favorite redneck an autographed copy. wink smile


Dylan Matthew Moran born 10/30/12


Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30392
08/03/06 11:45 PM
08/03/06 11:45 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
Enzo Scifo Offline
Underboss
Enzo Scifo  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
It wasn`t that good, you know. wink

Seriously Plaw, it was good but you started out too overhasted. Like JG said, you should have thought your plotlines out, write these and in between use those fill-ins of Puzo`s work that you wrote now.

The thing that bothered me most in this story was also what bothered me in the modern GF II story. Too few Italians.

I know we all think of the GF as not just another Maffia story, but as more of a family drama, and so much more.
Nevertheless, the Maffia and Italian culture play a major role in it. I liked GF I, III and the flashbacks of II because of all the Italians. And while I could live with for instance Jews like Roth, ... because they were after all a big part of real-life organized crime, those lawyers and Britans really annoy me. Io volio Italiani! tongue And there were not enough of them in your fricking fairy tale Plaw! wink I suggest you introduce at least 10 new Italians, no wait, Sicilians, with really 'Sicilian' names. Just for the sake of them being Sicilian. cool Capice?


Quote
See, we can act as smart as we want, but at the end of the day, we still follow a guy who fucks himself with kebab skewers.
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30393
08/04/06 01:08 PM
08/04/06 01:08 PM
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 11,467
With Geary in Fredo's Brothel
dontomasso Offline
Consigliere to the Stars
dontomasso  Offline
Consigliere to the Stars

Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 11,467
With Geary in Fredo's Brothel
PLaw, if you do not do this thing you will disappoint me, and you will make me angry.


"Io sono stanco, sono imbigliato, and I wan't everyone here to know, there ain't gonna be no trouble from me..Don Corleone..Cicc' a port!"

"I stood in the courtroom like a fool."

"I am Constanza: Lord of the idiots."

Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins #30394
08/04/06 02:07 PM
08/04/06 02:07 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
Enzo Scifo Offline
Underboss
Enzo Scifo  Offline
Underboss
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,854
Milky Way
And you know Plaw that Mister Tomasso is a man who insists on hearing bad news immediately. orange


Quote
See, we can act as smart as we want, but at the end of the day, we still follow a guy who fucks himself with kebab skewers.
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins [Re: Enzo Scifo] #345588
11/25/06 09:09 PM
11/25/06 09:09 PM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,224
The Ravenite Social Club
Don Cardi Offline
Caporegime
Don Cardi  Offline
Caporegime

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 18,224
The Ravenite Social Club
Several members here recently brought up Plaw's attempt at writing a sequal to the Godfather. So I have decided to resurrect this topic for those who are interested in re-reading the writings of Plaw, and also for those new members here who were not around when Plaw entertained us with his fantastic writing skills.


Don Cardi



Don Cardi cool

Five - ten years from now, they're gonna wish there was American Cosa Nostra. Five - ten years from now, they're gonna miss John Gotti.




Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins [Re: ginaitaliangirl] #345599
11/25/06 10:53 PM
11/25/06 10:53 PM
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 14,357
Texas
O
olivant Offline
olivant  Offline
O

Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 14,357
Texas
I once thought about a one act play: Vito comes back and talks with Michael (similar to the garden conversation), maybe the GFII Michael. "I never wanted this for you." Maybe it could be used as the segue to Michael's real or feigned epiphany that we see sort of in GFIII.


"Generosity. That was my first mistake."
"Experience must be our only guide; reason may mislead us."
"Instagram is Twitter for people who can't read."
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins [Re: olivant] #347491
12/03/06 05:07 AM
12/03/06 05:07 AM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3
sydney, australia
B
ben114 Offline
Associate
ben114  Offline
B
Associate
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3
sydney, australia
Yes, I am new here, and I have been considering some sort of my own project based on the Godfather, but I didn't realise that not only were so many other GF fans around the world already so far ahead of me, but with (and i never doubted this) so much talent, you've done a great job. I really enjoyed reading those posts. Unbelievable talent.

EDIT: I just had a look in another thread.. I'm so sorry.. has this member of the postboard passed away.. I'm only new around here.. Please accept my apologies, I'm very sorry RIP

Last edited by ben114; 12/03/06 05:15 AM.
Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins [Re: ben114] #347844
12/04/06 03:06 PM
12/04/06 03:06 PM
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 11,797
Pennsylvania
klydon1 Offline
klydon1  Offline

Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 11,797
Pennsylvania
Welcome, ben114.

I'm sure you'll find much around here that interests you.

Re: My Godfather Sequel....Chapter 3 begins [Re: Don Cardi] #347915
12/04/06 08:55 PM
12/04/06 08:55 PM
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 14,357
Texas
O
olivant Offline
olivant  Offline
O

Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 14,357
Texas
Originally Posted By: Don Cardi
************************************


Anthony Corleone sat on the edge of his bed not knowing if he should be happy that he would finally be spending some time with his father, or be dissapointed that he could not spend the day fishing with his uncle Freddie. He had grown rather fond of his uncle. Ever since nonna Corleone had passed away, he and uncle Freddie had become rather close. Uncle Freddie had become like a big brother to Anthony, doing the many things with him that his own father never seemed to have the time to do. Why was it that his father was always away on a business trip? He once asked Michael this question, during one of the rare times that they were able to spend together, and his father's response to him was "I'm doing this for you, and your sister. Someday, when you are older, when this is all yours, and you have a son of your own, you'll understand." Understand what? Anthony had silently thought to himself. He wouldn't dare talk back to his father. Understand that his father never had the time to spend with his children? That his mother could only visit he and his sister in secret? What was there to understand? It was clear to him now that his father was not a "normal" father, like the other kids fathers were. So many times he and his classmates would be sitting at lunch, mostly boys, and they would exchange stories of how they had gone camping with their fathers, or played a game of catch. Anthony always refrained from joining in on the stories that the other boys shared. What stories did he have to share with the other boys? That his father had thrown his mother out? That one night some bad men came and shot up his house? How every night since then Anthony would have nightmares and wake up shaking? How he wouldn't dare go to his father for comfort out of fear that his father would consider him a coward? No, Anthony would quietly sit there listening to all the other boys, envying them, secretly wishing that his own father could be a "normal" father like the others. But now he had his uncle Freddie. At least now he could go to school and tell his friends how he had spent the day fishing on the lake, having fun. Maybe now he would "fit in" with the others. It was all he could think about as he was about to get into the boat with uncle Freddie. That was until aunt Connie called him back to the house. His father had decided that they would be going to Reno together. Uncle Freddie had a look of dissapointment on his face. But he and Anthony both knew that there would be no choice in the matter. They both knew that when Michael decided something, there was no refuting it. So Anthony unwillingly walked back to the house and prepared himself to make the trip to Reno with his father.

*****************************


And in the boy's peurile, yet subtle and complex mind, a far-ranging plan of action was being initiated that would retrieve his mother's honor and bring his uncle back from the dead.


"Generosity. That was my first mistake."
"Experience must be our only guide; reason may mislead us."
"Instagram is Twitter for people who can't read."
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