Yep... We're Fucked!

I wish I was joking here but I have been doing some research and all signs point to a major cataclysm of unprecedented proportions COMING SOON to our neighborhood.


Do yourself a favor... Suspend your innate skepticism and read this all the way through...

This REALLY is NO JOKE!

Get yer shit together and get ready to kiss yer ass goodbye!

http://www.savelivesinmay.com/slimdocs/art-deep-impact-may-2006-En.htm

Not until 2012.

Go and try to scare the bejesus out of some other Board.

Apple

Hmmm. Asteroid, eh? Bummer.

I always thought I'd die by jumping through a ring of fire while holding two ukuleles on a unicycle made of dog hair.

Oh well....I'm having a drink. Anyone wanna join?

The Doc

Troll.

We have no idea how much at the mercy of other things we are. Who are we to even want to stand up to the beauty of Nature? I despise bullies, but I can't think of anything more overwhelmingly beautiful than natural forces of destruction. It's probably as noble a death as I can think of. Death by beauty.

I've marked my calendar.

I'm with you Mick,
Tornado
Volcano
Tsunami
Hurricane
Wind Storm
Earth Quake
Lightening Bolt
Take me Mother Nature.

Well, if we're all going to die, I propose a party.

Let's take drugs, listen to Moby, get naked, have sex, and get drunk. I'm going to go take compromising photos of myself with a hooker, smoke some marijuana cigarettes laced in PCP, and rape an infantile right in its eyelid. It won't matter in the morning anyways, because we're all going to die!

what he said

Tom Collins, on the rocks.

I'm pretty fast if I can dodge rain I can dodge a comet. It's my party trick, all done in matrix stylee bullit time.

I also have quite a tough noggin'. I'd stick a Glasgow kiss on the rock and send it back into orbit.

Nice party trick? Bet you can't make water out of wine though.

Ooh. I'm shivering in my boots. :rolleyes:

Pass it around.

Ok everyone. Your drinks are being sent UPS First Class Next Business Day Shipping (because we will be dead on the 25th, remember?) That will be $5.75 for the drinks and $87.92 for the shipping.

Pleasure doing business.

The Doc

Can I use Paypal? :p

Well I guess I'll see youse guys later...

Swimming in ARIZONA BAY!!!

You are a crafty one. I like your technique... Try and scare the living daylights out of us, by telling us about your cult or whatever it is, and then laughing it off like a joke.

Well, now I really do need a drink.

Hope everyone is spending their last day on Earth wisely!

I'm cutting the grass and hitting the bowling alley later, maybe a bite to eat after that. I want my grass to look better than anyone else's for the apocalypse.

Catch ya on the flip side,

The Doc

Oh, that's right...this is tomorrow!!!

My final goal before the MAY 26, 2006 - DAY OF DESTINY - is to get every single member of the Gangster BB to like me.

So everyone, we've got less than 24 hours...let's hear it, tell me what I must do to accomplish this seemingly immeasurable feat.

I'm waiting.

Apple

I (coughcough) "like" you just the way you are.

What fun would it be if you were nice and everyone "liked" you?

Stay just the way you are, Apple my dear.

And when we all meet tomorrow after the Big Bang or whatever you call it has already happened, and our paths cross as you head in one direction and I in another, I'll get an extra point or two which will help me along the way I'm going, for being such a good person that could write such a wonderful, warm, caring, understanding, loving, and compassionate post such as this one.

Kinda like Frequent Flyer miles that get me to my destination more easily.

:p

Oh, plawrence that's so sweet!!

But I'm afraid it's a bit too late to 'score points'...as you never did PM me with address and instructions for last Saturday (per the Gangster BB dinner thread).

I waited and waited

Speaking of the Gangster BB dinner (scheduled for June 7th)....I guess that's cancelled

Apple

*** gurble gurble ***

I called the restaurant and explained the situation, and they suggested that we take a "wait and see" approach.

The restaurant manager was very understanding, and said that in the event that the world did come to an end prior to June 7th, it wouldn't really be necessary to cancel our reservation or anything, as she expected the restaurant itself to be out of business anyway.

So if we're all still here on June 7th, the dinner is still on.

If not, well, c'est la vie.

Oh, and BTW, I requested that if possible the chef prepare a lamb special that night, as we had a few lamb and sheep lovers in the group. :p

I feel like I've just wasted the morning by cleaning my house and trying to get in touch with a dentist practitioner to get on the books.

Maybe, just maybe, if nothing happens I'll reap the rewards of a clean house and dental treatment (after going without for a year).

Thanks, due to my blind faith in your ability to acquire dinner reservations, I'll trust that you did the right thing barring any end of the world kind've thing will be there on June 7th.

By the way, I think I'll also call ahead & see if a donkey special can be added to the menu, as our group may include and ass or two as well.



Apple

I could say something very risque and ribald here, but since this BB is rated PG-13.....

Then say it over pre-dinner drinks on June 7th...since as the coordinator you've already obligated yourself to meet and greet early arrivals.



Apple

As am I... [starts to unzip pants]

Well then in your case Capo...I probably wouldn't be waiting very long.



Apple

I'm standing outside all day on my freshly mowed lawn so when the astroid comes crashing down I can try to hit it with my baseball bat in a very comical fashion. Also, being drunk will help.

The Doc

P.S. How did everyone enjoy their drinks? Refills?

Well, if this is the last day of the world, maybe we should all leave work early.

WTF?! Was this intended as a joke, as an attention grabbing manouver or what? Doesn't make any kinda sense to me...

I don't think thay wanted the people of Canada to know about it.

What's that fathersson, couldn't hear you. Guess I gotta turn the heater down in my igloo home. :p

Well, we made it past the 25th.

See you guys later, I've been sentenced to 25 years in jail for all the crazy shit I did yesterday expecting it to be my last day on Earth. Thanks a lot, Rico! :p

The Doc

Look on the bright side, Ferro - your lawn looks great!

This is true!

The Doc

Well Ferro, I think this calls for another round of drinks for everyone.. don't you agree?

I've been drinking White Russians ever since. I've got to get my asshole puckered for that long prison sentence I was talking about. Send me a few while I'm in the county slammer will ya? :p

The Doc