Love of Family

The connection a person shares with their family is one of strong convictions and personal bonds that can last a lifetime. But sometimes we love members of our family a little too much. Could you ever fall in love with a family member, and if you could how distantly related would this family member have to be?

Does it have to be a third cousin, or even farther back to fourth, fifth, or sixth? How many times do you feel like dipping in and and out, in and out of the genetic pool, before saying,"Am I doing something wrong?". Would those family functions be a little awkward when your grandpa somehow becomes your nephew in little over 10 years?

So please list some interesting situations that you have encountered or would be interesting in encountering and the feelings of taboo, regret and self embarrassment that comes with the territory of being with your own sister.

Well, not on purpose. Our family bond is not that strong on one side...

But when I was going out I met a girl, we started talking...you know the saturday night stuff....we liked each other...until we found out she was a cousin of me...

We were laughing and immediately said: god thanks we know it before something happens...

Well in WV, its legal to marry your 3rd cousin.

However, I'm afraid I wouldn't ever do that.

There's a church where I'm from where they have arranged marraiges, and they're all within the church. When I was little I went to school with a lot of the kids from there, and I used to wonder why they were all 'cousins'. Now I know.

Uhm, I don't know the situation, but I think you would at least know how your cousing looks like, no?

Not exactly. I have cousins on my father's side of the family I've never met. My father's been dead 18 years and I haven't seen any of his family since the funeral. Not all families spend holidays and weddings together. I have a cousin on my mom's side who I probably haven't seen since I was 10 years old.

But I do have a cousin Nicky who is fiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.

Probably third cousin, anything closer than that is just weird and even third cousin is kinda pushing it.

I just know my first cousins. I don't even know if I have any second and farther cousins. I think I am okay with second cousin mentally, but medically it is dangerous if you plan to have kids. Incest is a taboo for a good reason!

am I the only one who noticed that he mentioned being with your sister specifically?

can someone explain me how one's grandpa will become a nephew
Mista, I actually missed that sentence. sister = strict NO NO.

Mobb, if you were my brother I'd sleep with you!

Uhm, I don't know the situation, but I think you would at least know how your cousing looks like, no? [/b][/quote]Not at that time...I met her for the first time in lets say 10 years...

Who constitutes what is weird and what is acceptable?

What is weird? This is weird:

[/b][/quote]Because you were brought up to think that? Because of tradition? Because of biological fact that states incest is "weird" or "wrong"?

Why?

Because of biological fact that states incest is "weird" or "wrong".

Sorry, I meant to put speech marks around fact too.

Like: Because of biological "fact" that states incest is "weird" or "wrong".

Why isn't it a fact?

Hey, hey, if you're a dude and you get it on with your sister or vice versa and she gets pregnant, won't the kid have much greater chances of having birth defects? Not to mention, the whole Oedipal issues that the kid will face if he/she does make it past a year. I believe this is why incest is frowned upon in Western culture (and most others that I know of) at least, and that's why I would say that even with a third cousin it would be kinda weird but probably ok. With a cousin or second cousin it would be abnormal, to ME at least.

Actually if you are from a family with no defected genes, incest would lead to perfection. In the cases, where there are defected genes in a family, pairing these genes would result to a birth defect. For example, if there is a defected gene that could result to diabetes in a person, in case of insect there is a strong chance that this gene pairs up with another defected gene and result in a child suffering from diabetes. Of course, this could happen to the children of any two people whose defected genes matches; therefore there are certain genetic tests before marriage in some countries to reduce the birth defect rates. So if a family with perfect gene pattern inbreeds, there would be no hereditary problem with their future generation unless their gene pattern have a sudden change, that can happen to any specie.

When I was a child I had a crush on my first cousin and I felt he reciprocated. Special vibes, I guess, and all that stuff. We never even talked about it, still we have always been special to one another. We still are in a sort of way. Special to one another. I confess somewhere in the back of my mind I'm jealous of him. Thanks God he never married. I think I could have hardly stood it. :rolleyes:

So, yes. These things happen. I personally know a married couple and they are first cousins. And BTW they have two wonderful children. But, of course, brother and sister is a totally different matter.

Because it is an opinion.

I feel like if you have a baby with someone and it comes out with physical or mental deformities, because you're related to the person you had sex with, then that may be an indication that it is a biological fact that what you are doing is wrong.

I have two cousins, one first one second. It's absolutely impossible for me to imagine, how possibly one can see them as lovers. Maybe that's because I'm Orthodox. Never thought of them this way, really.

So then it would all depend on the situation. If the baby is born deformed, then it was wrong. If not, then it wasn't?

Deformation doesn't necessarily mean "wrong", does it?

Well, this was even more true in the early 1900s and earlier, but I know the Royal families in Europe have a history of hemophelia, because they're all... um... related. Well... "extra" related. You catch my drift.

Ask Glenn Hoddle!

Because it is an opinion. [/b][/quote]When two relatives (eg brother and sister) have a child, chances are higher of having a not normally functioning/deformed child. Not very fun for the child, and for the parents. When they do want to have a child, it can be seen as "weird" and not very thoughtful, IMO. Whether it's "wrong" is another discussion.

I presume that the fact we think incest is weird comes from the human biology. Clearly we just know, from birth on, that incest has it's risks. What you seemed to point out as a cultural thing, is just our biologic alarm that is cultivated and generally accepted.

Ask Glenn Hoddle! [/b][/quote]Ask Helen Keller.


*waits for public unrest*

In my personal point of view that incest is an infamia, and the Holy Church condemms it... But we are human flesh, we get corrupted. Right? It is amazing how many times I've been so close to have something with some cousin of mine that lives aroun Boston, but every time I've said "Fortunato, get a hold of yourself". But even Don Carlo Gambino married a cous, so why not? Anyhow, I pass

Because it is an opinion. [/b][/quote]When two relatives (eg brother and sister) have a child, chances are higher of having a not normally functioning/deformed child. Not very fun for the child, and for the parents. When they do want to have a child, it can be seen as "weird" and not very thoughtful, IMO. Whether it's "wrong" is another discussion.

I presume that the fact we think incest is weird comes from the human biology. Clearly we just know, from birth on, that incest has it's risks. What you seemed to point out as a cultural thing, is just our biologic alarm that is cultivated and generally accepted. [/b][/quote]Does general acceptance pertain to fact, then?

This is fact.

This is fact.

It's a fact that the presence of our biological alarm is generally accepted and cultivated into our modern thinking that incest is 'not done'.

Three facts, but the statement "incest is wrong" is still opinion.

I know. That's why I said this, two days ago

If it's wrong, why does it feel so right? Many a time in my younger years I felt the urge to keep my distance between cousins a little shorter than usual. That's why my cousins usually had such amazing grins in our family portraits. But I think if buzzin' cousins want to take their relationship to the next level, why stop them? I was always told to play nice with cousins, so I did. What's nicer than a few nights of passion behind the old oak tree.

Biological Alarm? If that existed, people would've stopped eating fast food. People do lots of things that are bad for their health because it simply feels good. Biological alarm cease to go off when there is an animal attraction between two people, now it really doesn't matter what gender or relationship they might've had.

What turns most people off about their siblings is the fact that they've lived together since childhood and suddenly feeling different about someone rarely happens compared to feeling love and attraction at the first sight.

In theory if people bred with their siblings, carriers of defected genes would've ceased to exist, due to the fact that their next generation would've not survived while those with perfect gene pattern would've produced generations of more consistent and stronger genes. However many gene patterns would've ceased to exist as the result.

With the existing taboos, carriers of defected genes spread up more and more and chance of the same defected genes paring up increases in every generation more than before. Here, pre-marital tests on thalassemia and hemophilia are mandatory. I personally know two people that were engaged but didn't get married after getting their test result, and they were not even remotely related.

Capo, you are asking a grand philosophical question which cannot be answered. Is murder wrong? Is anything at all wrong absolutely? Should anyone be punished for acts that he/she does not believe to be wrong?

svsg, I understand what you mean, but what about Al Quaida members, for instance? They certainly think 11/9 was right. Shouldn't they be punished then?

If anything, they're being punished by a system they're punishing. Antagonistic values going head-on.