Uzi's Ruminations 3/11 "Are Dead Bodies Hot?"

3/11

The vice chancellor of my university sent a mass e-mail this morning to let us know that a member of the campus community, a junior psychology major, was found dead in her bed. She was also an aerobics instructor, they said.

While it creeps me out that a 20-year-old girl can die in bed without committing suicide or foul play involved (which has yet to be determined), I was more concerned about FINDING this dead body.

Was the body naked? Was its face grinning or in agony? Eyes open or closed? Perhaps a wink? But most importantly, considering the body was evidently dead for at least a few hours before being discovered, was this aerobics instructors' body still hot?

I wonder if death makes a man forget his sex drive. I was, of course, thinking of myself. If I stumbled upon this corpse, and it was face-up in bed naked, would the thought of this body's beauty cross my mind? "Oh, man...she's dead (but she's kinda hot)." Not that her hotness would be of primary concern, but to be of ANY concern worries me.

I fear that I would...especially if she had a tan. I do believe I must be institutionalized for even bringing this up, but such is a rumination.

You're an idiot......

-Minnow-

I agree with Minnow.You are starting to sound like Ted Bundy.

I thought we were in agreement that Turi is the idiot?

And you, young lady, if you believe your gender will shield you from my wrath, you are utterly mistaken.

Yeah you are right Turi is too....

-Minnow-

Who said I couldn't hold my own against you? Just because you are a guy doesn't mean I will say,"Yes Sir" and step to the side.You aren't even that much older than me.Male or Female,I can take what you dish out.

Then take your clothes off and show us what ya got.....for a pork chop!

-Minnow-

Watch out for maggots,Poker.

I hear they can really cause irritation if you don't dig em out.

Hi Uz,
Have you ever thought of donating your brain to science, after your death of course? Your thought processes are quite interesting and I think further study would yield interesting results.

Necrophilia, Ewww. An undertaker in Bowie, Texas where my brother lives got caught doing that with this womans body.

I don't know, lots of married people though can probably testify to having sex with someone who doesn't show much more interest than someone dead might.

Minnow,the clothes come off for a T-Bone Steak,not a pork chop.

Why wait 'til after??

Uztopoke your compassion never fails to astound me

I went to a funeral on monday, as we arrived and parked up my husband tells me 'it may be an open coffin, I'm not sure' tell you what though, I froze and felt weak. I've never seen death and never want to (ok I'm a wimp) but, believe me if you can get turned on in reality by a dead body your sicker than I thought. But, then again it wasn't reality was it? Just a harmless 'rumination'

FH

Necrophelisim is a common problem,
consult with others....

Necrophilia is not the issue, folks. Come on...I have no interest in poking a dead body. I'm talking about something less criminal; something more analytical. aka, how long does it take for a hot body to REALLY look dead and NOT be hot?

It has nothing to do with gender, which was the point of what I wrote to you. As for age, I don't know what your basis for comparison is.

So yes...to return to the original point, which has been confounded, I will treat you as an equal among friends and enemies. Not men and women.

But you must understand that I have been looking to make enemies on the BB for quite some time. It's far more interesting. It just seems that no matter what I say, no one wants to be my nemesis. It's unfortunate.

This has got to be one of the most disturbing threads on the BB.Why in hell are you talking about the hottness of a CORPSE? She had been dead and rotten for a few hours(as you said).Her body would have been very pale on top and BLUE almost PURPLE on bottom because all of the blood goes south when you die.So,this means no more tan,poke.Still sound 'hot' to you.That is sick and actually kinda degrading.

You will learn to know and adore me with time, ShortCake...you are still a Godfather BB infant. Everyone else has fallen under my wicked spell

Many of my comments are absurd. My "Ruminations" are just that: products of incessant brooding. Is my mind an enigma? An anomaly? I try to believe it isn't. That helps me sleep at night.

FYI: I happened to come across your "Bumbling Idiot" thread. I am 10 years older than you. But that's NOTHING compared to Camillus Don...he is 70 years older than you.

I'm just waiting for someone to lop off that over-inflated, egotistical, solipsist, right-wing head of yours.

But you KNOW that isn't going to happen. No one will challenge me. I await anxiously for someone to do so, to no avail.

I need to maintain the outward appearance of the most despicable, ridiculous, egotistical, beastly bastard on the BB to DRAW someone to the ranks of "enemy." And it has yet to come to fruition.

I'm really rich.
I'm a great dancer.
I'm really handsome.
I'm really smart.
I'm a snappy dresser.
I'm awesome in bed.
I'm unstoppable.
I'm a king.
Fuck all of you.

See?

I'm really rich. --NOT if you're an editor
I'm a great dancer. --NOT if you're a white cracker
I'm a snappy dresser. --again, NOT if you're a white cracker

The rest I don't know about.

And Shortcake is right, the body turns blue very quickly.

W O W

Is there any other kind of cracker?

But notice that you couldn't touch the other assertions I made...*blows heartily into valve that inflates own head*

Yes,Poke,there are other kinds of crackers.Graham Crackers.And they are not white,they are brown.OOh,I bet that one hurt,didn't it smart ass? You must have a big head to hold all of that cockiness.You think you are 'really' handsome? I saw your picture.You aren't handsome.Not to me,anyway.

There you go! THAT's the kind of talk I want to hear!

Despite butting in on my "cracker" bit with Saladbar and making no valid point (I can name 50 different crunchy crackers...this was sardonic and explicitly catalogued with "whitey" and "honky"...I fear you believe I am white supremacist, which, again, is a misunderstanding racked up with your infancy), everything you said hurt me immensely! Bravo!

However, it is too bad that you limit yourself to Italians and Hispanics. Brazilian and Portuguese men are good-looking, as are many eastern Europeans.

And I cannot comment on your physical attributes. It's against the law.

Okay,SC,rather than deleting it,how about I explain it? When it comes to my 'love' life,I am mainly attracted to hispanics/italian guys.My boyfriend is Mexican(just an example).I am not criticizing any other men of any other nationalities/race/etc..I am just saying that those are the types I am attracted to.So when Poke got the big head thinking he was hot stuff to everyone,I had to let him know that EVERYONE is not attracted to him.

Poke,if you knew of so many other types of crackers why did you ask if there were any other kinds?Like I said,you were being a smart ass.Also,I had every right to join in on your conversation with Saladbar.If you can jump in the middle of conversations in other threads,why can't anyone else?I'm sure SB didn't mind.

This is really interesting.

OK, then,

I'm awesome in bed. - I honestly do not know.
I'm unstoppable. - Not if your receptionist sits on you.
I'm a king. - of what? small town CT?
Fuck all of you - Thank you for that sentiment.

I changed it,SC.

Saladbar,ha ha!!..Sentiment!!
You know how guys are ,though.They ALL brag about how great they are in bed.

Not really.

Wow..what could you have possibly said to me that was bad enough to warrant deletion? My my. Aren't we a little firecracker? Why don't you shoot me a Private Message and explain.

But anyway, you really don't know anything about my "head." I placed a disclaimer on my post that you should have read before insulting me. Anyone here that has been around for a while will testify to my TRUE charcteristics. So, your insults really don't bother me.

Additionally, you are not the kind of enemy I am looking for. I look for enemies along ideological lines rather than the childish sticks and stones you lash at me.

Yes, we make better comrades. If you are the type to hold grudges, that's OK. You won't be here very long.

Someone(who shall remain anonymous ) has already 'filled me in' on your 'true' characteristics.Why would I waste a Private Message to explain why & what SC asked me to delete when all you have to do is scroll the page up and read my post that SC followed up on?

I don't mind ShortCake. You can jump into any convo I'm having. I like anyone with spunk. I'm glad Don Vercetti has a friend. I worry about him.

Though I think Poke is wickedly handsome, he is still a Cracker. And yes, "white" cracker was stupidly redundant. (Lots of bad adverbs in this paragraph...).

I love me some Saladbar!

Yeeeaaah it is.

Well it is now we're over the dead body hot thing. Oh dear that was terrible.

And I think that ShortCake and Salad Bar are much more good looking than you...then again I suppose that's natural

-Penguin

PS - what kind of a sick base of a thread is this? Of course dead bodies aren't hot!

I doubt the person with whom you spoke knows a goddamn thing about me.

Saladbar embodies the beauty without, as well as within. I can't compete with that.

But I don't know, Anton...I think you're beautiful.

Thank-you so much Uz, that means a lot to me coming from a guy who thinks dead bodies are hot

I'm sure you'll like me more when I'm dead.

-Penguin

I missed this earlier. That is VERY sweet Poke. Thank you. (Resisting any self-deprecating comments here, you'd be proud).

It is a good thing that with posts like your "Sex Dreams" rumination there is no worry about you getting a soft reputation.

good one,SB.
Poke,you're a loser.
Thanks Anton!

I changed my avatar,Saladbar!DV made it for me!

I think you need to use more precise language. I may be a lot of things, but a loser I am not. I would say that I have done some fairly admirable things in my life.

awwww, this is unkind. Uzi is controversial, outspoken, entertaining , annoying and one hell of a laugh at times. I don't know him much at all but I would never describe him (or anyone else I didn't know) as a loser. Rock on Uzi

FH

You are right FH, Poke is many things, but not a Loser. He is very good to the people he knows and cares about.

However, he does like to play hardball with some newbies, I think ShortCake knows this now.

I have a girl friend that when I went to a funeral I saw her, but she was unconscious, you wanna know why?
The funeral was open coffin, and I saw the dead body and felt weak, but she was weaker, and I asked a friend what happened, and he sais that as soon as she saw the body, she just passed out, then, when she recovered consciousness, she felt dizzy and threw up, and a couple of hours later, she fainted again.
She missed school for a couple of days and nobody talks about it....

No, no, no, SaladBar. It is not redundant when used as a pejorative; bolstering a racial insult as in "that Jew h****" or "that Black ****" etc.

poke and I are on good terms now.I just thought you all should know.

Great! I was just bolstering my racial pejorative. Ha Hah! Thanks my so good friend BK -- I'm not (completely) stupid! I got to learn not to give up so quickly.

Plus another thanks for thinking my M/C Romance Help idea was good one. I think so too, and I'm a member of the XX chromo club to which it was directed to. Man, if only guys would listen to me...

You've got a crisp mind and refreshing posts, so I was not going to get involved but as Snake would say, (but with a different accent) "it was just doing my duty, ma'am".

BTW, guys should listen. What's right is right.